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You know you are getting old when:

2jakes

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,680
Location
Alamo Heights ☀️ Texas
Bum: "Say, buddy, can ya help me out? I'd like to get a cup of coffee..."
Harpo Marx: (Reaches into coat pocket and pulls out a steaming cup of coffee, complete with saucer, and hands it to bum.)

At a diner one day, my reporter and I
noticed an elderly lady carrying a card board sign that read "Hungry please give
money for food, Bless you!".
My friend ordered the lunch plate special
and brought it to her.
She looked at him and said she would
rather have the money.
My friend tried to explain it was a fresh plate & not leftovers, but she cut him
off using a very "salty" language that
only a LizzieMaine would appreciate.

Turned out she wanted the money to buy booze! :p
 
Last edited:
Messages
10,596
Location
My mother's basement
^^^^^^
No reference to your coworker, but you gotta wonder just how naive people can be. I recall telling an old girlfriend that you just don't leave packages unattended on front stoops in my then neighborhood. Not only might the package get stolen, but it serves as an advertisement that no one is home, so come on in and help yourself to whatever you can carry out.

She was also reminded that the money she might give panhandlers was more likely funding their substance abuse than feeding them.

This is why I prefer food drives over most other charitable exercises. I'm more confident that the money I shelled out for that jar of peanut butter which I placed in the collection barrel will actually feed a person.
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
Messages
33,040
Location
Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
During my brief sojourn on the West Coast, the drunks who used to congregate in front of the Thrifty Drug would appeal for change to be spent on those little six-packs of Thunderbird and Night Train by saying stuff like "Hey, I need fifty cents to buy a dolly for my little girl."
 

BlueTrain

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,073
That sounds like coded language. Tramps used to have a code they used, I have heard.

I may have mentioned this before but when I was little, in the 1950s, it was not unusual for people to go door to door asking for a handout. Some would show you a little dog-eared and dirty card that said they were deaf and dumb (could not speak). I don't know if they were or not and I don't remember if they were ever given anything. It was a railroad town and there was one place, a clearing in the woods where I believe tramps would gather. Tramps are the original migrant workers.
 
Messages
16,862
Location
New York City
At a diner one day, my reporter and I
noticed an elderly lady carrying a card board sign that read "Hungry please give
money for food, Bless you!".
My friend ordered the lunch plate special
and brought it to her.
She looked at him and said she would
rather have the money.
My friend tried to explain it was a fresh plate & not leftovers, but she cut him
off using a very "salty" language that
only a LizzieMaine would appreciate.

Turned out she wanted the money to buy booze! :p

A few years back, a down-and-out looking guy used to stand outside our local grocery store asking for money for food all the time. We'd give him money from time to time, but one time, my girlfriend went in and bought him two fresh sandwiches from the prepared foods counter. He gave her a hard time about how he'd rather have the money / he likes to pick what he eats / etc. We found out later from a cop that he uses the money to by booze and cigarettes.

But all aren't like that. Another guy we used to see when we worked out in the morning in Central Park never asked for anything, but clearly was hurting. So we asked him if he'd like something from the nearby food cart. He was very shy about it and we tried to do it in as low-key a way as possible, but he said he'd love a Pepsi (and I said, "how bout an egg sandwich too" as it was breakfast time and he nodded ok).

Well, we got into a habit of buying him the same every time we saw him and he was as gracious and appreciative each time (and we tried to make it so low key as if it almost wasn't happening). The best was when he told us how much he loves Pepsi, so I bought a carton of 12 from the cart and gave it to him - he was so pumped. I get it - we didn't save the world / nothing in our world went lacking / we aren't great people. I understand all that fully, but this much is true - he seemed really happy in that moment and that made us happy.
 
Messages
10,596
Location
My mother's basement
In Seattle there is now a "wet house," a subsidized apartment building for what had been street drunks, where the residents are allowed to drink.

Much wailing was heard about "enabling" such self-destructive and socially undesirable behavior. But the prevailing argument was that the chronic drunks were gonna drink whether they had shelter or not. And it was far less costly to house them than to transport them by ambulance to the county detox facility, where many were on a first-name basis with the staff.

Me, I'd prefer every drunk dry out. And I'd rather it rain only between the hours of 3 and 6 a.m. and that it was sunny every afternoon. If these guys are bound to drink themselves to death, that's what they'll do. Better they do it in their own beds. Whatever one's take on the "humanity" of the issue, there's no denying it's cheaper to put roofs over their heads. Unless we're okay with just letting them die on the sidewalks a little sooner than they might otherwise.
 

vitanola

I'll Lock Up
Messages
4,254
Location
Gopher Prairie, MI
The great medieval Jewish schollar Maimonides in his wisdom posited eight levels of charity. All men, regardless of religious belief may do well to keep them in mind.

There are eight levels of charity, each greater than the next.

[1] The greatest level, above which there is no greater, is to support a fellow man by endowing him with a gift or loan, or entering into a partnership with him, or finding employment for him, in order to strengthen his hand until he need no longer be dependent upon others . . .

[2] A lesser level of charity than this is to give to the poor without knowing to whom one gives, and without the recipient knowing from who he received. For this is performing a mitzvah solely for the sake of Heaven. This is like the “anonymous fund” that was in the Holy Temple [in Jerusalem]. There the righteous gave in secret, and the good poor profited in secret. Giving to a charity fund is similar to this mode of charity, though one should not contribute to a charity fund unless one knows that the person appointed over the fund is trustworthy and wise and a proper administrator, like Rabbi Chananyah ben Teradyon.

[3] A lesser level of charity than this is when one knows to whom one gives, but the recipient does not know his benefactor. The greatest sages used to walk about in secret and put coins in the doors of the poor. It is worthy and truly good to do this, if those who are responsible for distributing charity are not trustworthy.

[4] A lesser level of charity than this is when one does not know to whom one gives, but the poor person does know his benefactor. The greatest sages used to tie coins into their robes and throw them behind their backs, and the poor would come up and pick the coins out of their robes, so that they would not be ashamed.

[5] A lesser level than this is when one gives to the poor person directly into his hand, but gives before being asked.

[6] A lesser level than this is when one gives to the poor person after being asked.

[7] A lesser level than this is when one gives inadequately, but gives gladly and with a smile.

[8] A lesser level than this is when one gives unwillingly.

I was lucky enough to have been the recipient of that highest level of charity in my youth, and it frankly made me. Note Maimonides' unstated but ever present concern for the dignity the recipient. Much like Mr. Fast' s beautiful example. There really is joy in giving to those who we consider our equals. When we consider those we help to be our inferiors it seems that giving becomes a chore. That seems to me a pity, for it robs us of one of the great joys of this life.
 
Messages
10,596
Location
My mother's basement
^^^^^
I don't know who first said "better to be occasionally cheated than perpetually suspicious."

I haven't been much victimized by crime in recent years, pleased to report. But such was not always the case. It was not a paranoid imagination that had me on guard more often than not. Bad things happened, to me, to my neighbors, occasionally to visitors. One guest had a rock thrown through a side car window as she went driving down the street.

Poverty and hostility make for unpleasantness all around.
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
Messages
33,040
Location
Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
I've been mugged at knifepoint (when I was eight years old, yet), I've had my car broken into and rifled for drugs several times, I had a meth lab on one side of my house, and a heroin house on the other, I had a taxicab driver robbed at gunpoint in front of my house, and a young woman was kidnapped by a roadside abductor over in the next block.

Most of these events have happened within the past ten years. Love your neighbor, but keep the door locked and a pistol in the nightstand.
 
Messages
11,908
Location
Southern California
...She was also reminded that the money she might give panhandlers was more likely funding their substance abuse than feeding them...
This has been mentioned to me a number of times. The way I see it, if that's what that person needs to make it through another night, so be it.

...I was lucky enough to have been the recipient of that highest level of charity in my youth, and it frankly made me. Note Maimonides' unstated but ever present concern for the dignity the recipient. Much like Mr. Fast' s beautiful example. There really is joy in giving to those who we consider our equals. When we consider those we help to be our inferiors it seems that giving becomes a chore. That seems to me a pity, for it robs us of one of the great joys of this life.
I've never heard of Maimonides or his Eight Levels of Giving before, but I definitely agree about the dignity involved in such an act. I sincerely believe I'm in no position to judge anyone, and could find myself in their situation one day. If that were to happen, I would hope such charity would be given with kindness and at least a little respect for me as a "person" rather than a "bum".

Advice by the cops: "A shotgun, this way you won't miss. But make sure they are on your property!"
That wouldn't work in this part of California. Even if you encounter a burglar in your house, legally you can't assault them unless you can prove you were acting in self-defense and that your life or the lives of any of your family members and/or friends present were at risk. o_O
 

2jakes

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,680
Location
Alamo Heights ☀️ Texas
.....That wouldn't work in this part of California. Even if you encounter a burglar in your house, legally you can't assault them unless you can prove you were acting in self-defense and that your life or the lives of any of your family members and/or friends present were at risk. o_O

If I encounter a burglar inside my house,
I am not going to ask for proof that
my life or the lives of any of my family
is at risk.
The moment they break in without
permission, disregarding the warning
signs posted,
they lost all rights and will suffer the consequences.
At least that's what the police told
me. They also said they would
help me drag the body inside the
house. In case I shot the burglar
as they were running out of my home.
As I said before, they suggested a
shotgun so that I wouldn't miss.
Another officer said that a magnum
hand gun might go through his
body and continue to my neighbor.
Which makes sense. I know Polo
feels safe because he knows I will
not hesitate and will do whatever
so that he can enjoy a good sleep.
 
Last edited:
Messages
11,908
Location
Southern California
If I encounter a burglar inside my house, I am not going to ask for proof that my life or the lives of any of my family is at risk. The moment they break in without permission, disregarding the warning signs posted, they lost all rights and will suffer the consequences...
"Warning signs". As if people don't already know it's wrong, and illegal, to trespass and/or burglarize.

But that's my "White male middle-class" perspective. Not long ago I read an online article about a young African American male (please pardon me if that's no longer the proper politically correct term) who had been shot and killed by a homeowner while he was burglarizing their home, but the focus of the article was the comments made by the young man's mother who, apparently, saw nothing wrong with what he was doing when he was killed. "We live in the ghetto. How else was my son supposed to get the things he needs to live?" My initial reaction was, "Uhh, get a job?", even though I realize that's not such an easy thing to do for some people, but...well, as I was once told by a police officer, "For some people prison is a step up." That being said I agree with you, and if I find a stranger in my house I'm going to assume he/she doesn't have my best interests in mind and I will do whatever I can to protect myself and my family.

...At least that's what the police told me. They also said they would help me drag the body inside the house. In case I shot the burglar as they were running out of my home...
During a "Student and Law" class in high school one day our guest speaker was a local police officer. While discussing the legalities of shooting a burglar, he half-jokingly told us to drag the body inside the house if necessary, and at the very least to put a kitchen knife in his/her hand as evidence you were protecting yourself from a physical assault. The thing is, most police officers have a wide variety of experiences in such matters, can usually determine what actually happened on the spot, and will side with the homeowner or occupants of the house. But if the investigation ends up in a courtroom the attorneys can twist the truth into almost any form so they can "win" their case; "facts" and "truth" become a matter of perspective.

...As I said before, they suggested a shotgun so that I wouldn't miss. Another officer said that a magnum hand gun might go through his body and continue to my neighbor. Which makes sense...
Stopping power can be too much of a good thing. A .22 doesn't have the impact of a 9mm, but it can still be used effectively in the right hands. Also, if you're trying to prevent someone from stealing your $1,000 television, it defeats the purpose if you do $5,000 worth of damage to your house and injure or kill someone (other than the intended target) in the process.
 

kaiser

A-List Customer
Messages
401
Location
Germany, NRW, HSK
"Warning signs". As if people don't already know it's wrong, and illegal, to trespass and/or burglarize.

But that's my "White male middle-class" perspective. Not long ago I read an online article about a young African American male (please pardon me if that's no longer the proper politically correct term) who had been shot and killed by a homeowner while he was burglarizing their home, but the focus of the article was the comments made by the young man's mother who, apparently, saw nothing wrong with what he was doing when he was killed. "We live in the ghetto. How else was my son supposed to get the things he needs to live?" My initial reaction was, "Uhh, get a job?", even though I realize that's not such an easy thing to do for some people, but...well, as I was once told by a police officer, "For some people prison is a step up." That being said I agree with you, and if I find a stranger in my house I'm going to assume he/she doesn't have my best interests in mind and I will do whatever I can to protect myself and my family.

During a "Student and Law" class in high school one day our guest speaker was a local police officer. While discussing the legalities of shooting a burglar, he half-jokingly told us to drag the body inside the house if necessary, and at the very least to put a kitchen knife in his/her hand as evidence you were protecting yourself from a physical assault. The thing is, most police officers have a wide variety of experiences in such matters, can usually determine what actually happened on the spot, and will side with the homeowner or occupants of the house. But if the investigation ends up in a courtroom the attorneys can twist the truth into almost any form so they can "win" their case; "facts" and "truth" become a matter of perspective.

Stopping power can be too much of a good thing. A .22 doesn't have the impact of a 9mm, but it can still be used effectively in the right hands. Also, if you're trying to prevent someone from stealing your $1,000 television, it defeats the purpose if you do $5,000 worth of damage to your house and injure or kill someone (other than the intended target) in the process.

I had a similar experience when taking class needed to get a permit to carry back in the early 80's. We had a guest speaker from the District Attorneys Office who basically said that if you have to defend yourself in your house that it is good strategy to kill your attacker as "dead men tell no tales". This would then give you an advantage if the incedent did go to court.
 

2jakes

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,680
Location
Alamo Heights ☀️ Texas
The police who I spoke with were not
kidding or joking about which weapon
to use.
And should it end up in a courtroom,
no matter how much twisting from
the attorneys.
The testimony by the officers and
their police report is very persuasive
in court.
At least this is the case in my neck of
the woods.

Btw: I would never recommend a .22
caliber as a weapon to deter a perpetrator.
The chances for retaliation is less if
you use a higher caliber for stopping
power.
 
Last edited:

Stanley Doble

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,808
Location
Cobourg
I had a widowed aunt who asked a police officer friend what kind of gun she should buy for self protection (she lived alone).

The policeman advised her to get a big dog. We got her a very sweet natured German shepherd. If a stranger knocked on the door she would hold the dog's collar. The dog being curious would strain forward. The more she pulled back the more the dog pulled forward, and growl a little deep back in his throat.

You might not be surprised to learn that all her callers were very polite and respectful, and never made any sudden moves.
 

2jakes

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,680
Location
Alamo Heights ☀️ Texas
The city meterman always jumped the backyard fence to take a reading.
But now, they knock on the front door
and ask if it's safe to go take a reading.
I believe the reason for this are my
pit-bulls that reside in back.
Although they never bother Polo.
They are very protective.
You try to come close me and they
will let you know how they feel
about that.
 
Messages
10,596
Location
My mother's basement
I had a widowed aunt who asked a police officer friend what kind of gun she should buy for self protection (she lived alone).

The policeman advised her to get a big dog. We got her a very sweet natured German shepherd. If a stranger knocked on the door she would hold the dog's collar. The dog being curious would strain forward. The more she pulled back the more the dog pulled forward, and growl a little deep back in his throat. ...

I heard a police officer give the same advice at a sizable gathering of neighbors following the brutal and unsolved murder of one of their own.

One of our two mutts has a bark more fitting a dog three or four times his 22-pound size. But once the door is answered he figures the visitor has come to see him and the biggest threat he presents is leaving fur on their clothes.
 

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