The Vintage Suitor

Mildred · Jun 20, 2007

This is for the men at Fedora Lounge. Some hints from the ladies on how to sweep her off her feet.

1. Bring gifts. A corsage of gardenias, a nosegay of violets or a dozen red roses. And candy-Whitman's sampler, chocolate covered cherries or Brown and Hayley Almond Roca.

2. Don't smoke, drink or curse. Even if she has a mouth on her like Carole Lombard.

3. Remember to open the doors-both car and the nightclubs. Pull out her chair.

4. If you can't dance the vintage dances. Take lessons. Don't expect her to teach you.

5. Write her love poems or songs.

These are my personal top five. Please feel free to add your own.

Or if you are a man-do the ladies add up in your books? Feel free to give us tips.

glamoursurf · Jun 20, 2007

DONT ever call her MAAM! Ack I hate that term!

Viola · Jun 21, 2007

I wouldn't call smoking or especially light social drinking a deal-breaker. [huh]

-Viola

Miss_Bella_Hell · Jun 21, 2007

Actually, I don't require any of those criteria. My top criteria include the following:

1. Have a sense of self.
2. Be intelligent.
3. Have a sense of style.
4. Be able to handle your liquor. lol
5. Let me order the wine if you don't know anything about it. I do.

Viola · Jun 21, 2007

Don't laugh at her for being unable to dance. I can't help it!

-Viola

panamag8or · Jun 21, 2007

Viola said:
Don't laugh at her for being unable to dance. I can't help it!

-Viola

Neither can I.

JazzBaby · Jun 21, 2007

The man should walk closest to the road so the lady doesn't get splashed by passing carriages.

Too vintage???

Undertow · Jun 21, 2007

The following may seem "mean" or a little too "up front" but I certainly have learned the hard way and this is the advice given from other women. These are here to add to the list:

1. Take a compliment well with a smile and a "Thank You". If you chose to remark on her compliment (i.e. "That's a great hat!" "Thank you, it certainly does cover my head."), make them funny and short (not that my example was funny by the way).
2. Be humble. No one likes an arrogant, smarmy brat.
3. Have confidence in everything you do from putting on your shoes to swimming across a lake, etc. However, make sure you're able to admit when you're wrong, or don't be overconfident!
4. Read a few newspapers and stay current with events; local, national and global. There's nothing worse than meeting some good looking guy and realizing he doesn't have a clue about anything short of his favorite sport.

There's more but I'll leave it at that for now (and I'm getting of work soon!

)

panamag8or · Jun 21, 2007

JazzBaby said:
The man should walk closest to the road so the lady doesn't get splashed by passing carriages.

Too vintage???

I hope not... I still do that.

Miss Lucy June · Jun 21, 2007

Undertow said:
1. Take a compliment well with a smile and a "Thank You". If you chose to remark on her compliment (i.e. "That's a great hat!" "Thank you, it certainly does cover my head."), make them funny and short (not that my example was funny by the way).

Yes, definitely. I think that's a good rule for everyone...learn how to take a compliment! No one likes to give compliments and have them instantly dismissed with some excuse or reason to the contrary...

Mildred · Jun 21, 2007

Viola said:
I wouldn't call smoking or especially light social drinking a deal-breaker. [huh]

-Viola

A glass or two is okay but there is nothing worse than watching a man get drunk on a night out with a date. Maybe I am old fashioned but if the woman does not smoke...it can be hard to take.Cough. Cough.

BegintheBeguine · Jun 21, 2007

Miss Lucy June said:
Yes, definitely. I think that's a good rule for everyone...learn how to take a compliment! No one likes to give compliments and have them instantly dismissed with some excuse or reason to the contrary...

Same here, Miss. I wonder whether they're saying I'm lying or that I have bad taste.

1. Do NOT compare the lass to your mom.

Diamondback · Jun 21, 2007

Miss_Bella_Hell said:
1. Have a sense of self.

Umm, ouch. That's gonna kill me on the dating front, with all the psych "reconstructive surgery" I still have to go through...

Viola said:
Don't laugh at her for being unable to dance. I can't help it!

Hey, a number of us guys can't either... it'd be a "double-standard foul", and I'm only cool with those under two simultaneous conditions:
A. It's MY standard and
B. I'm holding myself to the higher of the two.

JazzBaby said:
The man should walk closest to the road so the lady doesn't get splashed by passing carriages.

Too vintage???

Just a little too vintage there, Miss JB. I usually favor the roadward side, but if there's an alley or deep-inset doorway or other "predator cover" coming up on the building-side, I'll form up on that side until past the potential trouble spot. I also usually trail behind a little bit, in "wingman" position...

Miss Lucy June said:
Yes, definitely. I think that's a good rule for everyone...learn how to take a compliment! No one likes to give compliments and have them instantly dismissed with some excuse or reason to the contrary...

Does an "awww, shucks..." work here for those of us that tend to be a little awkward?

Miss_Bella_Hell · Jun 21, 2007

Diamondback said:
Umm, ouch. That's gonna kill me on the dating front, with all the psych "reconstructive surgery" I still have to go through...

Lies! lol

Diamondback · Jun 21, 2007

Miss_Bella_Hell said:
Lies! lol

What? How so? I feel it would be less than honest if I didn't disclose up-front that I'm a headcase in need of a total rebuild from the neck up...

gluegungeisha · Jun 21, 2007

Take her somewhere nice. Note that "nice" is not synonymous with "pricey." Swing dancing in my city is $3 cover just to support the bands, DJs and community center, and lessons (Jitterbug and Lindy Hop every week, and occasionally Jive and Charleston lessons too) are free! Or go on a picnic. I love picnics.

Be wrong sometimes. It's humbling.

Don't zone out while she's talking to you! If you're completely uninterested in the subject matter, subtley change the subject...but not without adding SOMETHING to the conversation so she knows she's not talking to a wall.

I personally can't stand smoking, but that's because I don't smoke. It might vary person to person. If you smoke, keep some mints on hand.

Don't soak yourself in cheap body sprays or colognes like they do on television! I can't stand that stuff. I appreciate someone who smells nice, but a lot of the cheap scents are just nauseating, especially in high doses. I think that habit might be a New Mexican thing...almost every time I ride the route 66 bus, some guy will take out his cologne bottle and show it to his friends. This one guy who was trying to pick me up on the bus gave me his empty cologne bottle when he walked off without my number.

Don't spend more time in the bathroom than she does. My stepdad does that, and it drives my mother insane. lol

Jovan · Jun 21, 2007

Suggestions 1 and 5 in the first post would really creep out the women I know...

Adelaidey · Jun 21, 2007

Not staring at my chest would be a great way to start... but I guess that is asking too much? [huh]

Viola · Jun 21, 2007

Jovan said:
Suggestions 1 and 5 in the first post would really creep out the women I know...

Count me among them. Unless its an anniversary, or a birthday, or something.

-Viola

Jovan · Jun 21, 2007

Exactly. I don't discount that it may help doing those two after you've gotten to know her a while, but with many women, "suiting" like that doesn't exactly go over well. Times have changed, for the better I think. We can socialize with women casually. There's little need to be a real suitor these days.

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