60Years2Late said:Ya know, I was reading all of thoses posts, and a couple of them really made me wonder. Here we are in a forum that hails dressing up as the coolest thing since ice cubes, and I see some people that say that classy is defined by jeans.
Jeans have never been, since their inception and even now a "classy" thing. Regardless of how much you get paid, jeans are considered your beater clothes, your work clothes. Jeans can be dirty, torn, or frayed, and they're still jeans. In the Marine Corps, when we go do security, or go out as a unit, or do anything that involves us going anywhere except base, we generally are not permitted to wear jeans. We have to wear khakis and a polo, or a nice collared shirt. If the shirt has tails or is excessively large, it must be tucked in. A belt is required on any pants that have beltloops, with a conservative buckle. THAT is not classy. That is acceptable.
Classy implies that you have class. Remember, clothes make the man. It is your first impression that counts. Regardless of what YOU think of yourself, and no matter what today's society tells you to the contrary, remember that worrying about what people see you as is not focusing on them; it's respecting yourself. You care enough about yourself to make sure nobody grades you as a low-life bum.
Where I was raised, in the South, in the country at that, I had to live by a very conservative set of rules. You see, the biggest adjustment for me in coming to California was not prices, people being rude, the dry air, or the lack of trees. It was the fact that kids didn't respect their elders. If you haven't got respect for your parents, you don't feel proud of your family name, and to me, that is HUGE. When I dress up, or go in public, or interact with people, I think of my parents. Everything I do reflects not only on myself, but on them. Did they raise me right? Am I a good person? Did they teach me manners? If I mess up, it's not just me that messed up, it's them too! People don't think about that these days. If you don't dress up because it's accepted and it's convenient to dress tacky, then remember this. You represent more than just you. Sure, you may be happy with it. Heck, I LOVE to walk around naked, but that doesn't mean I'm going out in public that way. You reflect on your raising, your employer, your friends, and your region. Wrong or right, people think about you in a stereotypical way, and the group everyone you know as being like you. That's just life. It might not be ethical, and it might be wrong, but a phrase that will do you well in life is this, and allow me to embolden and italicize it, so that you will all remember it for the rest of your days.
PERCEPTION IS REALITY
What people see is what people think, and if you're okay with letting them think you're a bum, though you have high enough self confidence not to let it bother you, you also have a very serious lack of personal pride.
Say what you want to the contrary, but that's the truth, no way around it. You know it, I know it, and everybody else knows it. And even if you don't know it, refer to what I stated above. Perception's reality. I perceive that to be true, so in my eyes, you've got no sense of pride or honor, and your poor image reflects poorly on your raising. That's reality. Sorry, but welcome to life.
Sometimes you gotta grow up and think about things from a point of view other than your own. That's what they mean when they say respect to others. Not to those around you, but to those you represent.
OH! And an elaboration on this:
It is not pretentious to enforce a dress code. The dress code is one of the things advertised. Their other patrons paid to eat in such an environment. It is not only their right as an establishment, but their DUTY to their patrons (the ones who followed the rules) to hold you to the same standard. THey follow it, the other patrons follow it. You should to. Don't take it personal. And if you do, tough. That's the way the world works.
First of all, Great post.
Just some points I'd like to throw in and I apologize for not elaborating on these topics but it's been a hard day.
American culture seems completely youth orientated.
Living in an age of pretty much what I call a second "Gilded Age". American decadence is at its height people spend indiscriminately without any thought of frugality or savings.
American morality is pretty much do whatever you want it is going to work itself out. the whole me first who cares about you philosophy.
Nobody really respects anything anymore.
yeah, the above points are pretty sweeping and their is little analysis but let's be honest take them altogether and why people don't dress up makes sense.
Why would I dress up when I don't have to. Its easy to look like a bum, its hard to dress up and especially when dressing up draws attention to yourself. In a time when everyone loves diversity, people really don't like to go outside their clique. meaning everyone was wearing hoodies and flip-flops no one would pipe up and say, hey guys maybe we should dress up. its a hard decision and why bother. just go the easy route.