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Do you look like a past relative and get negative comments for it from family?

rue

Messages
13,319
Location
California native living in Arizona.
I don't know if this has been brought up, but has anyone been told they look like a relative from the past, after they started wearing vintage, that wasn't a particularly pleasant person and then been told to change something about the look... ie their hair, clothes, etc?

I was told by my mother that I look like my grandmother (who was not nice to her) with my hair in the 40s style and she was really quite irritated with it and wanted me to change. I have bangs now, which I quite like, but it also made her feel better. Now I'm wondering if I should have just kept the look I had or if it really looked that bad.... hmmmmm...... [huh]
 

Wire9Vintage

A-List Customer
Messages
411
Location
Texas
Oh my... but I do know what you mean. My daughter has a resemblance to a great aunt of mine who was... an interesting lady (to say the least). Anyone who ever had a run-in with her is pretty well scarred for life! BUT, I remind my daughter that her great-great aunt was a beautiful and stylish woman who lived a very long life on her own terms and no one else's!

Probably you can compromise...when you're around your mom, wear your hair differently. You may not even know how deep that feeling goes. Elsewhere, wear what you like, how you like.
 

annet

One of the Regulars
Messages
149
Location
Antwerp, Belgium
i look like my dad, and my mother really doesn't like that! but not because of the vintage style... it's just my face.
 

TillyMilly

One of the Regulars
Messages
263
Location
UK
I look like my Dads sister when she was young- although lookswise she is morbidly obese with really bad hair and no make-up and personality wise she is a raving Christian and has very strong opinions and quite odd traits. So you think i might be a bit miffed about the comparisson but actually...

I can see what people mean when they say that i look like her as i can see that our features are similar and so is our colouring -and I can see it even more when they say that i act like her as we do share a lot of manerisms and we are both very strident in our views (I'm a raving atheaist). I can also see that it would be very easy to turn into her, healthwise as i get older and also in my life style though so it's motivation to keep my weight healthy and also to get out and socialise a bit more, as am a bit of a hermit and prefer my own company most of all.
 

baby_butterfly

One of the Regulars
Messages
108
Location
Manchester, Uk
YES!! my mum, me, and my younger sister are like exact clones of each other except smaller. Every person that has ever met us has said so but its has never been a negative thing. On the contray most people find it fasinating how we look so similar.
 

Spitfire

I'll Lock Up
Messages
5,078
Location
Copenhagen, Denmark.
Judge for yourself.
At the left my grandfather age 40 - at the right myself, same age.

Unavngivet-1.jpg
 

rue

Messages
13,319
Location
California native living in Arizona.
i look like my dad, and my mother really doesn't like that! but not because of the vintage style... it's just my face.

With me, it wasn't until I wore my hair like my grandmother that she noticed, but I always thought so. She wasn't happy about it either, but it's not like I can help it!

I look like my Dads sister when she was young- although lookswise she is morbidly obese with really bad hair and no make-up and personality wise she is a raving Christian and has very strong opinions and quite odd traits. So you think i might be a bit miffed about the comparisson but actually...

I can see what people mean when they say that i look like her as i can see that our features are similar and so is our colouring -and I can see it even more when they say that i act like her as we do share a lot of manerisms and we are both very strident in our views (I'm a raving atheaist). I can also see that it would be very easy to turn into her, healthwise as i get older and also in my life style though so it's motivation to keep my weight healthy and also to get out and socialise a bit more, as am a bit of a hermit and prefer my own company most of all.

I get what you're saying. My grandmother was a raging alcoholic in later life and very mean when she was drunk, so I'm glad it's just the looks that I take after.

YES!! my mum, me, and my younger sister are like exact clones of each other except smaller. Every person that has ever met us has said so but its has never been a negative thing. On the contray most people find it fasinating how we look so similar.

That IS fascinating! I would love to see a picture :)
 

Spitfire

I'll Lock Up
Messages
5,078
Location
Copenhagen, Denmark.
Holy smokes! It's uncanny!! Is that a negative in your family or a positive? Going just by looks it's a positive :)

Deffinately possitive! He was a stout, selfmade man - ropemaker with more than 25 employees - with a soft heart and a great sence of humor!.
I was his firstborn grandchild - and he spoiled me!!!!
Sadly he died when I was only 7 years old - but I still have some very fond memories of both him and my grandmother.
 

rue

Messages
13,319
Location
California native living in Arizona.
Deffinately possitive! He was a stout, selfmade man - ropemaker with more than 25 employees - with a soft heart and a great sence of humor!.
I was his firstborn grandchild - and he spoiled me!!!!
Sadly he died when I was only 7 years old - but I still have some very fond memories of both him and my grandmother.

I'm so sorry you only had him until you were 7, but so glad you have those memories. Grandpa's are the best :)
 

Puzzicato

One Too Many
Messages
1,843
Location
Ex-pat Ozzie in Greater London, UK
When I was about 16 I was at a family Christening, and my mum couldn't stop giggling because she could see this identical row of noses - me, my aunt, my grandmother & my great-grandmother. I look exactly like my father's family but heart & soul I belong with my mother's kin, so she looks beyond my appearance.
 

23SkidooWithYou

Practically Family
Messages
533
Location
Pennsylvania
Hi Rue,

I look a lot like my my Mom but the resemblence ends there. She's loud and gregarious, I'm quiet and reserved. She would rather have teeth pulled than go shopping but I could "hunt" all day. She's content with a bar of soap and shampoo while I need all the lotions and potions and girly necessities. My Mom laments that she was not born in the days of log cabin life while I prefer the stage set to movies like "Laura" or "Rebecca". My late Grandmother and I were more alike in temperament and interests than my Mom and I. So, I may look like my Mom but it's when people say, "Oh you're just like your Grandmother (sometimes with a roll of the eyes, lol) that makes me happy! :)

I think your Grandmother was adorable and you are stunning! It's funny, but my Mom doesn't always remember my Gram in the same glowing fashion that I do. So, maybe it's a mother-daughter thing? The age old conflict that no woman can explain and no man should question. ;)
 

Edward

Bartender
Messages
24,804
Location
London, UK
Back when I was about 19, my mother produced a pair of photos (which we still have somewhere) of my maternal grandmother's parents. Great Nana McCaw died a few months before I was born, but (while he never got over her loss, and ultimately that's what stopped him reaching the 100 I'm sure), Great Granda McCaw made it to 97, mind still sharp as a tack and sense of humour moreso. I think I take after him personality-wise in some respects. He was the first, as far as I am aware, of our family to go to University (which would have been back about 1908). Anyhoo, the photos were taken within months of them meeting each other, he at twenty-one, she seventeen. At the time I first saw them, I was the spitting image of him. Less obvious now I'm older and have a shaved head. I think there are also touches of Granda Marlowe in me. He was a southpaw too, though being an earlier generation he had it beaten into him in school to write with his right, to the point that he was by training rather than genetic ambidextrous, and by habit always reached for a pen with his right hand first.
 

crwritt

One Too Many
Messages
1,109
Location
Falmouth ME
I sound like my mother on the telephone, and my daughter sounds like me. Lookalike, I'm not sure, but for a time in my 30's I
strongly resembled a photo of my Grandmother in her teens.
 

Wire9Vintage

A-List Customer
Messages
411
Location
Texas
Here we are:

papaandjean2-1-1.jpg
IMG_9923.jpg


Not the best pictures for comparison, but it's the best I could do, since I rarely smile in pictures. I'm also about 20 years older than her in this picture and heavier.

Yes, there certainly is a resemblance! You're both beauties! I hope your mother can look beyond her memories and see how nice you look in your vintage wear!
 

rue

Messages
13,319
Location
California native living in Arizona.
When I was about 16 I was at a family Christening, and my mum couldn't stop giggling because she could see this identical row of noses - me, my aunt, my grandmother & my great-grandmother. I look exactly like my father's family but heart & soul I belong with my mother's kin, so she looks beyond my appearance.

I think it's so neat that your looks have been carried down the line! Aside from my grandmother, I don't really look like anyone else. My mother on the other hand looks like her grandmother and my daughter looks like my mother. Generational skipping I guess lol



Hi Rue,

I look a lot like my my Mom but the resemblence ends there. She's loud and gregarious, I'm quiet and reserved. She would rather have teeth pulled than go shopping but I could "hunt" all day. She's content with a bar of soap and shampoo while I need all the lotions and potions and girly necessities. My Mom laments that she was not born in the days of log cabin life while I prefer the stage set to movies like "Laura" or "Rebecca". My late Grandmother and I were more alike in temperament and interests than my Mom and I. So, I may look like my Mom but it's when people say, "Oh you're just like your Grandmother (sometimes with a roll of the eyes, lol) that makes me happy! :)

I think your Grandmother was adorable and you are stunning! It's funny, but my Mom doesn't always remember my Gram in the same glowing fashion that I do. So, maybe it's a mother-daughter thing? The age old conflict that no woman can explain and no man should question. ;)

Thank you for the compliment :eek: My mom and I are opposites too. I'm much more of a sappy love kinda gal and my mom is very much the hard edged sarcastic kind.... hmmmm..... It really may just be a mother daughter thing!
 

rue

Messages
13,319
Location
California native living in Arizona.
Back when I was about 19, my mother produced a pair of photos (which we still have somewhere) of my maternal grandmother's parents. Great Nana McCaw died a few months before I was born, but (while he never got over her loss, and ultimately that's what stopped him reaching the 100 I'm sure), Great Granda McCaw made it to 97, mind still sharp as a tack and sense of humour moreso. I think I take after him personality-wise in some respects. He was the first, as far as I am aware, of our family to go to University (which would have been back about 1908). Anyhoo, the photos were taken within months of them meeting each other, he at twenty-one, she seventeen. At the time I first saw them, I was the spitting image of him. Less obvious now I'm older and have a shaved head. I think there are also touches of Granda Marlowe in me. He was a southpaw too, though being an earlier generation he had it beaten into him in school to write with his right, to the point that he was by training rather than genetic ambidextrous, and by habit always reached for a pen with his right hand first.

I understand what you're saying about looking like someone when you're a certain age. I don't really think I looked like my grandmother until I was older and that may be why my mom didn't notice.

Isn't it funny how times have changed in school? I was at the tail end of anyone caring how you wrote, much less what hand you wrote with.

I sound like my mother on the telephone, and my daughter sounds like me. Lookalike, I'm not sure, but for a time in my 30's I
strongly resembled a photo of my Grandmother in her teens.

Now that I do share with my mother.... we sound identical and no one can tell us apart on the phone.

I would love to see a side by side picture of the two of you, in fact everyone that has made a comment. I think it would be fun :)

Yes, there certainly is a resemblance! You're both beauties! I hope your mother can look beyond her memories and see how nice you look in your vintage wear!

Thank you so much! :eek:
 

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