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well date with the gorgeous gal went great last nite, sans a lesson learned

Smithy

I'll Lock Up
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5,139
Location
Norway
[QUOTE="Doc" Devereux]Another Cornishman here, Charles.

To be honest BT is quite right. Not even the two people involved are going to be aware of every factor involved in a situation like this.

Is it really appropriate to be discussing this in a public forum? Imagine the young lady's reaction if she were to happen upon this thread...[/QUOTE]

Well said Doc.

All the joking aside, does a gentleman "kiss and tell"?

Perhaps best to keep schtum about it.
 

Foofoogal

Banned
Messages
4,884
Location
Vintage Land
Charles. As you are new in town and it sounds like you were maybe just smitten with this gal and wanted some advice.
Now it is not nice to kiss and tell but it just sounds like the lady maybe was a lady and just a bit offended by the sudden move.
If you really like her just send her some roses and a note of apology.

I fixed up a man with a friend of mine and the guy that usually was a motor mouth no kidding couldn't say a word all night. Sometimes guys and gals can make bad first impressions but then make a comeback. :)

Also maybe next time keep the lights on.
 

CharlesB

Suspended
Messages
1,100
Location
Philly, Americaland
I wouldn't know whether it was the first or second. We met early in the nite a few days before the previous date. The nuts and bolts of it being that we met up and instantly spent the entirety of the evening together including some intimate things. This was considered a proper start. I'm all for being all old fashioned when it comes to someone that I find to be rahter exceptional
 

LolitaHaze

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,244
Location
Las Vegas, NV
Good luck... I don't think I'd want to date someone that would be that sensative to an honest mistake. Especially after you explained the difference in meaning.
 

Jessica Reinard

Familiar Face
Messages
69
Location
London
CharlesB said:
Hoping to be a gentleman, I squired her back to her place and when arriving and heading to her room I offered to grab her a drink and then kill the lights

I don't think it was only the suggestion of ambient lighting that might have offended your fair maiden but perhaps the introduction of alcohol. Not only did you not want to see her you also had to be under the influence to be in her company.

Also, I know of no gentleman who "cavorts" on the second date.
 

Chas

One Too Many
Messages
1,715
Location
Melbourne, Australia
I lived with an Englishwoman once (from Leicester), and what I learned that the absolute worst thing you can do to an Englishwoman is embarrass her in public.

Seeing as your faux pas was pretty much private, I doubt that any long term damage was done.
 

M Tatterscratch

A-List Customer
Messages
358
Location
Near Chicago, America, 1920s
Pardon me for butting into the conversation, but...

Golly, Mister B., tough luck. Darkness can mean a lot of things, I guess. Next time (if there is one - sorry, old man) let HER get the lights.

And try telling her you only hit the switch to see if her halo glowed in the dark. :D

Awkwardly American,

T.

P.S. - If it's a no-go, don't worry - She's not the real Christina Richie, anyway.
 

CharlesB

Suspended
Messages
1,100
Location
Philly, Americaland
actually i literally meant drink. she was thirsty. I was going to grab myself a glass of ice tea cuz she said she had some in the fridge. Neither of us were drunk, nor do I beleive that if one party is sober and the other isn't that it goes beyond a hug at the door.
 

M Tatterscratch

A-List Customer
Messages
358
Location
Near Chicago, America, 1920s
[QUOTE="Doc" Devereux]Is it really appropriate to be discussing this in a public forum? Imagine the young lady's reaction if she were to happen upon this thread...[/QUOTE]

Aww, it's not like Mr. B. is bragging his head off - He's a man looking for advice from like-minded friends, and surely you know how hard that can be, especially on such a sensitive subject! Kissing and telling would be posting her name, address, and photograph, unless there's only one possible Christina Ricci lookalike in England and we all know her.

This is a chap who's feeling uncertain about his behaviour and asking friends for their point o' view to make it right. That's what a gentleman does - Admit he's at fault, consult his peers for advice if needed, and then try to make amends so that everyone is comfy.

I guess he could have PMed people, but perhaps he's looking for a range of objective opinions. Besides, the FL should be like the confessional booth!

Mister B., I think the Cornish contingent is out for blood! :p

Fee Fi Fo Fum,

T.
 

reetpleat

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,681
Location
Seattle
Funny story. I initially thought you wold be like many of the lounge and comment how you squired her to her door and would not come inside as you are an old fashioned gentleman and she was offended or some such. There are some who are very traditional in habit on this loung, and others less so but still into the clothing. I am the latter.

As for your story, firsly, it is very funny and should give your mates a good laugh aat the pub some night, as long as you do not identify the lady of course.

There are many possible explanations. One is all at face value. YOu offended her via local custom or habit. BUt if she was into you, that seems unlikely.

It is possible she is just very insecure, in which case you might be best to avoid further involvement.

It may be that she felt you wre moving too fast and was looking for a way to slow things down. But that seems much odder than a simple, lets slow down, or just being physically non responsive or pulling away physically. Women are quite good at that and only have to resort to other things when men do not get the hint, which I am sure was not your problem. Besides, if you wer actually heading for "her room" rather than "her rooms" as in the english sense of her general apartment, then it is unlikley you would have even gotten that far if she was hesitant.

It is possible that she is the typle that like a guy to take the lead and maybe you were, but asking about the lights put her oof or killed the mood. silly maybe, but had you just dimmed them or asked her for acandle, or lit a hall light then turned off the room light that might have set a better flow and mood.

It is awkward to all of a sudden be sitting in total darkness when you don't know your way around the room, or to have to start in bright lights and then stop, get up to turn them off, then again, be in sudden darkness. Think ahead man, think ahead.

Or maybe she was just feeling a little nervous and kind of short circuited.

I gues we will never know. Bottom line is if she was cool about it and you were cool and could laugh a bit, then it might be worth another date.

Funny story though, and refreshing to see this not turn into a nother (modern people have no manners nd do not know how to date) thread.
 

Tango Yankee

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,433
Location
Lucasville, OH
The US and the UK--separated by a common language

Your story reminds me of one I heard from one of my troops in Germany. He was stationed in England a number of years previously. Shortly after he arrived there some friends introduced him to a young woman, and he asked her out. When he arrived to pick her up she wasn't ready, but as they were leaving she apologized for being late. He told me he joking replied "That's OK, but if it happens again I'll have to turn you over my knee and spank your fanny."

At this point in the story it's a good idea to describe the two different meanings of the term "fanny" borrowed from another web site:

In the US: The fleshy part of the human body that you sit on; "he deserves a good kick in the butt"; "are you going to sit on your fanny and do nothing?" [syn: buttocks, butt, backside, buns]

In the UK: external female sex organs; "in England `fanny' is vulgar slang for female genitals"

Unlike Charles' experience, once she got over the shock and he got over the embarrassment they apparently had a good time on their date, as they did wind up getting married before his tour ended.

I've gotta go with the others on this one, though... she was looking for a way to cool your jets, either for the evening or permanently.

Regards,
Tom

PS I still miss England. I just applied for a job with the Dept of the Air Force and put down various bases in England for desired location. :D
 

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