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The Age of Entitlement

nice hat dude!

One Too Many
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1,168
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Lumby,B.C. Canada
I don't think a child can have too much genuine affection, because love wants what's best for the other and so would generally exclude creating a spoiled brat. Maybe too many undeserved/unrealistic statements I can see, absolutely. As far as maybe stemming from parents feeling guilty, I can see that. But I think it's more about parents who themselves act like children due to a culture that celebrates immaturity as a birthright.

Ok but those parents are a product of a generation of the freedom and peace and love movement and now they're doting on their children,at least this is how I see it but can be convinced otherwise and he that has never been or acted immature may cast the first stone?
 
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sheeplady

I'll Lock Up
Bartender
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4,479
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Shenandoah Valley, Virginia, USA
I don't think a child can have too much genuine affection, because love wants what's best for the other and so would generally exclude creating a spoiled brat. Maybe too many undeserved/unrealistic statements ("compliments", "appraisals", "Special Snowflake" etc) I can see, absolutely. As far as maybe stemming from parents feeling guilty, I can see that. But I think it's more about parents who themselves act like children due to a culture that celebrates immaturity as a birthright.

There is the possibility that in modern times when both parents have to work to make ends meet and they feel guilty about having to leave the kids alone or with a sitter so they lavish gifts and affection on them and make them feel like the world revolves around them they grow up having all they ever wanted just for being,they then grow up believing they are entitled.Possible?

I think the problem here is something that happened after WWII. We got obsessed with stuff. We work for our stuff. We constantly want more stuff. We center our lives around stuff. We "need" more and more stuff- a bigger and another car, a three stall garage, a bigger house, more, more, more stuff. Think about the typical U.S. family: they come home, eat either a takeout or a prepared meal, and then go sit in front of the television. The television (and associated resources) being stuff. The TV takes away about 6 hours of the average family's time. And as we sit in front of the TV, we are bombarded by more stuff being advertised. We are stuff obsessed.

In fact, we are so obsessed with stuff that we constantly need to buy more stuff. Buying and maintaining more stuff is what we center our lives around. Then there is storing the stuff, organizing the stuff, and buying more and better stuff to help us with that. We have little time to even enjoy the stuff we have, because the focus is always on getting more stuff. I don't think some people can actually even enjoy themselves and be content with the stuff they already have- the thrill is in the accumulation of more and more stuff. I really think we have a generation- possibly several- who has become so "stuff" orientated that they don't know other ways of being happy or even recognizing happiness in themselves. They are so cut off from reality that all they know is stuff. If you ask them what they are working for or looking forward to, it's more stuff. The next purchase.

As a result, they're empty inside. They really don't have as meaningful relationships as they could. So filling this void becomes a priority, and of course, the only way they know how is to fill it with stuff. After all, they have been taught to associate "stuff" with love. They think, "everyone deserves love" (and they are right about that) but the only love they can comprehend is "stuff." So their brain gets short circuited and instead of "i deserve love" it becomes "i deserve stuff." And they feel entitled to that stuff.

People can't make those meaningful connections because stuff is constantly in the way, draining their energy, time, and financial resources. So parents buy their kids stuff and buy themselves stuff because they feel this emptiness. And everyone is so emotionally confused inside and so hungry for something deeper and better but they don't know what that is. The only thing they know is that when they buy something or have something, it makes them feel a tiny bit better. And since they feel so awful, they do the only thing they can do to make themselves feel better:

They buy more stuff.

Obviously, this is an oversimplification, but I do think that consumerism has eroded our society very badly. There are numerous people out there who have become so consumed in consuming that they don't have deep relationships anymore with other people. I don't think that you have to be a minimalist to be happy (by far) but I do think if you're spending your life concerned only with objects you certainly aren't going to be happy. And I see a lot of people's whose lives revolve more around the stuff in their houses than the people in them.
 
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13,379
Location
Orange County, CA
The WW2 generation doesn't totally escape responsibility, either. Middle-class baby boomers didn't grow in a Petri dish -- they got whatever they screamed for, and somebody had to give it to them. An awful lot of the toxicity of the modern era got its start in the postwar world.

It's a perfect illustration of the old adage that the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. The World War II Generation who were dealt the double blow in life of growing up during the Depression and fighting a war quite understandably felt that their children should and would never have to go through what they went through. Unfortunately it didn't quite occur to them that often it is precisely those very tribulations that develop character.
 
Messages
13,379
Location
Orange County, CA
In fact, we are so obsessed with stuff that we constantly need to buy more stuff. Buying and maintaining more stuff is what we center our lives around. Then there is storing the stuff, organizing the stuff, and buying more and better stuff to help us with that. We have little time to even enjoy the stuff we have, because the focus is always on getting more stuff. I don't think some people can actually even enjoy themselves and be content with the stuff they already have- the thrill is in the accumulation of more and more stuff. I really think we have a generation- possibly several- who has become so "stuff" orientated that they don't know other ways of being happy or even recognizing happiness in themselves. They are so cut off from reality that all they know is stuff. If you ask them what they are working for or looking forward to, it's more stuff. The next purchase.

:p:D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLoge6QzcGY
 

nice hat dude!

One Too Many
Messages
1,168
Location
Lumby,B.C. Canada
I think the problem here is something that happened after WWII. We got obsessed with stuff. We work for our stuff. We constantly want more stuff. We center our lives around stuff. We "need" more and more stuff- a bigger and another car, a three stall garage, a bigger house, more, more, more stuff. Think about the typical U.S. family: they come home, eat either a takeout or a prepared meal, and then go sit in front of the television. The television (and associated resources) being stuff. The TV takes away about 6 hours of the average family's time. And as we sit in front of the TV, we are bombarded by more stuff being advertised. We are stuff obsessed.

In fact, we are so obsessed with stuff that we constantly need to buy more stuff. Buying and maintaining more stuff is what we center our lives around. Then there is storing the stuff, organizing the stuff, and buying more and better stuff to help us with that. We have little time to even enjoy the stuff we have, because the focus is always on getting more stuff. I don't think some people can actually even enjoy themselves and be content with the stuff they already have- the thrill is in the accumulation of more and more stuff. I really think we have a generation- possibly several- who has become so "stuff" orientated that they don't know other ways of being happy or even recognizing happiness in themselves. They are so cut off from reality that all they know is stuff. If you ask them what they are working for or looking forward to, it's more stuff. The next purchase.

As a result, they're empty inside. They really don't have as meaningful relationships as they could. So filling this void becomes a priority, and of course, the only way they know how is to fill it with stuff. After all, they have been taught to associate "stuff" with love. They think, "everyone deserves love" (and they are right about that) but the only love they can comprehend is "stuff." So their brain gets short circuited and instead of "i deserve love" it becomes "i deserve stuff." And they feel entitled to that stuff.

People can't make those meaningful connections because stuff is constantly in the way, draining their energy, time, and financial resources. So parents buy their kids stuff and buy themselves stuff because they feel this emptiness. And everyone is so emotionally confused inside and so hungry for something deeper and better but they don't know what that is. The only thing they know is that when they buy something or have something, it makes them feel a tiny bit better. And since they feel so awful, they do the only thing they can do to make themselves feel better:

They buy more stuff.

Obviously, this is an oversimplification, but I do think that consumerism has eroded our society very badly. There are numerous people out there who have become so consumed in consuming that they don't have deep relationships anymore with other people. I don't think that you have to be a minimalist to be happy (by far) but I do think if you're spending your life concerned only with objects you certainly aren't going to be happy. And I see a lot of people's whose lives revolve more around the stuff in their houses than the people in them.

So now we just have to get them to realize 1.Stuff doesn't make you happy but for a short time 2.You can't take your stuff with you when you go...Those might be some tough lessons to teach?
 

PrettySquareGal

I'll Lock Up
Messages
4,002
Location
New England
Sad but true everyone seems to want to be in the spotlight to obtain the attention they so desperately seek and will strive to get there by any means,good,bad or otherwise,but alas we digress away from the topic at hand?

I'm on topic. Wanting to be the center of attention is part of entitlement today.
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
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33,094
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Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
I'm on topic. Wanting to be the center of attention is part of entitlement today.

There were plenty of trashy tabloid celebrities in the twenties -- hello there Peaches and Daddy -- but we've moved on a notch since then. People were satisfied just to find an old copy of the Evening Graphic on the subway and sop up their dose of sleaze from there -- but we've gone beyond just wanting to consume trash, we want to create it ourselves. Hence the ever-increasing popularity of making a damn drunken fool of one's self on Facebook or Yoo Toob.

Forget about being famous for fifteen minutes -- we now have a culture that offers everyone the chance to be famous for fifteen seconds, and everybody's just jumping at the chance.
 

nice hat dude!

One Too Many
Messages
1,168
Location
Lumby,B.C. Canada
There were plenty of trashy tabloid celebrities in the twenties -- hello there Peaches and Daddy -- but we've moved on a notch since then. People were satisfied just to find an old copy of the Evening Graphic on the subway and sop up their dose of sleaze from there -- but we've gone beyond just wanting to consume trash, we want to create it ourselves. Hence the ever-increasing popularity of making a damn drunken fool of one's self on Facebook or Yoo Toob.

Forget about being famous for fifteen minutes -- we now have a culture that offers everyone the chance to be famous for fifteen seconds, and everybody's just jumping at the chance.

Ah you mean like the photo page"People Of WalMart"
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
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Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
That page is a whole 'nother thing -- an example of the rampant classism that degrades modern American mass culture, the result of an overentitled generation of smug white hipsters who think the whole rest of the world exists for their derision. Don't get me started on that.
 

PrettySquareGal

I'll Lock Up
Messages
4,002
Location
New England
That page is a whole 'nother thing -- an example of the rampant classism that degrades modern American mass culture, the result of an overentitled generation of smug white hipsters who think the whole rest of the world exists for their derision. Don't get me started on that.

How does one get you started? I'd like to. I did start this thread, so...
 

sheeplady

I'll Lock Up
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Shenandoah Valley, Virginia, USA
I do think that "stuff" has somewhat been replaced with "the spotlight."

People want attention at any cost.

I think that stuff is what allows the biggest spotlight. Paris Hilton certainly isn't famous for anything but her money. If she was an average gal who wasn't rich who made a sex tape, she'd have gotten 15 minutes of fame. But yet she is a household name because she made a sex tape and is rich. And if you look at what the media tells us about her, it's about 1. the fabulously rich people she dates or sees or 2. the fabulously expensive stuff she has/ is wearing/ etc.
 

PrettySquareGal

I'll Lock Up
Messages
4,002
Location
New England
I think that stuff is what allows the biggest spotlight. Paris Hilton certainly isn't famous for anything but her money. If she was an average gal who wasn't rich who made a sex tape, she'd have gotten 15 minutes of fame. But yet she is a household name because she made a sex tape and is rich. And if you look at what the media tells us about her, it's about 1. the fabulously rich people she dates or sees or 2. the fabulously expensive stuff she has/ is wearing/ etc.

But much of "reality TV" is about "regular" or poor folks like Honey Boo Boo, and YouTube sensations are about bad behavior gone viral.

Also, Kim Kardashian has replaced Paris Hilton long ago.
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
Messages
33,094
Location
Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
How does one get you started? I'd like to. I did start this thread, so...

There are several "hipster" threads where we thrashed that subject to death -- suffice it to say that I think that kind of HA HA HA HA LOOK AT THE UGLY POOR PEOPLE so common among the hipster set is as vile, as despicable, as dehumanizing, and as destructive to our society as racism is. Perhaps even more so nowadays, with racism having been driven underground by the thin layer of enlightenment that has been glued down like cheap contact paper on the surface of today's civilization. Racism has to be expressed secretly, in the anonymity of Internet comment sections and such, but you can be as classist as you want in today's world and get a book deal out of it.

I don't know anything about this Honey Booboo thing other than what I've seen in the paper here and there, but from what I understand it's exactly the same kind of thing: HA HA HA HA LOOK AT THE UGLY POOR PEOPLE. Smug, entitled middle-class white people reinforcing their sense of entitlement by mocking poor, "culturally-deprived" white people. Disgusting.
 
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sheeplady

I'll Lock Up
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Shenandoah Valley, Virginia, USA
But much of "reality TV" is about "regular" or poor folks like Honey Boo Boo, and YouTube sensations are about bad behavior gone viral.

Also, Kim Kardashian has replaced Paris Hilton long ago.

Well, I think that the segment of reality TV that focuses on characters like Honey Boo Boo and the like is essentially focused less on admiration and more on criticism. It's like the bunch of people who watch Springer or Dr. Phil who can say "at least I'm not that messed up." My knowledge of Honey Boo Boo is all second hand, but from what I have read/heard her family isn't that regular or representative; after all, she got her fame from beauty pageants and her family certainly is not poor now, despite how they may live. I doubt the fascination with her family comes from their commonality with people and more with the fact that they are so uncommon and so easily looked down on. Most common people would make poor entertainment. We either want something to admire or that makes us feel admirable.

I do think there is a sad segment of society that seeks out television that exploits people and makes fun of them (for poverty, for weight issues, for sexual escapades, for anything really) just to make themselves feel better about their lifestyle. It's the "at least I'm not that bad" phenomenon. And I do think that has a lot to do with things like "thank god I live in this nice house and not a dirty trailer" and "thank god I', not forced to shop at Walmart" a lot more than "thank god I can put food on the table and have normal relationships."

Kim Kardashian is rich, so I'm not sure what the point is by mentioning her.
 

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