Want to buy or sell something? Check the classifieds
  • The Fedora Lounge is supported in part by commission earning affiliate links sitewide. Please support us by using them. You may learn more here.

Are you a Military wife?

PS

A-List Customer
Messages
448
Location
PA
I am not a military wife, but rather a military sister/best friend.
She is in basic right and she is really trying our relationship. Really trying.
I send something out to her at least 4 times a week, letters, photos, care packages and I just got the cruelest letter. Calling me a B....
She told me she asked her mother for some things, I guess mom never sent them and it became an issue because she is being threatened with a re start. Do they not give them toilet paper? When she goes to AIT will she ease up or will she thinks she gets to talk down to me? She has always been there for me and we've had our ups and downs but after that letter I have sat on my hands all week and not sent anything additional. I did send the 100 plus dollars worth of stuff she claimed to need or she would have to re start. I feel really taken advantage of....
 

SayCici

Practically Family
Messages
813
Location
Virginia
PS said:
I am not a military wife, but rather a military sister/best friend.
She is in basic right and she is really trying our relationship. Really trying.
I send something out to her at least 4 times a week, letters, photos, care packages and I just got the cruelest letter. Calling me a B....
She told me she asked her mother for some things, I guess mom never sent them and it became an issue because she is being threatened with a re start. Do they not give them toilet paper? When she goes to AIT will she ease up or will she thinks she gets to talk down to me? She has always been there for me and we've had our ups and downs but after that letter I have sat on my hands all week and not sent anything additional. I did send the 100 plus dollars worth of stuff she claimed to need or she would have to re start. I feel really taken advantage of....
What did she ask for you to send? I'm confused about the re-start thing. I know my husband needed some additional paper work sent to him during BT but nothing besides that.

She shouldn't be wanting for things like toilet paper, no. If you're in the US, they get a kind of credit card that they use to buy toiletries and similar things (correct me if I am mistaken please).

While she is likely stressed out right now, I can't imagine why she would write to you in such a way. That attitude is all hers. :/
 

Berlin

Practically Family
Messages
510
Location
The Netherlands
Yes, I am an army wife.
My man serves the green berets. We call it 'Korps Commando troepen' in the Netherlands.

He's 25 now, but joined when he was 18. He went to Iraque once and twice Afghanistan. It's in holland the most dangerous part of the militairy and very rough and difficult to have a relationship, since he's most of the time away from home and it can be happen that I won't hear 2-3 weeks from him if he goes on patrol outside the base in Afghanistan, and not knowing if he's still alive. But real love survives! And I am sure we will!
 

C-dot

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,908
Location
Toronto, Canada
SayCici said:
She shouldn't be wanting for things like toilet paper, no. If you're in the US, they get a kind of credit card that they use to buy toiletries and similar things (correct me if I am mistaken please).

While she is likely stressed out right now, I can't imagine why she would write to you in such a way. That attitude is all hers. :/

It's the same in Canada. If you're on base, there is a store called the Canex which sells anything and everything a soldier could need - If you're deployed or in the field, they make sure to supply you with basic ablutions like toilet paper.

I agree, stress happens, but it is not an excuse to demean your friends. I don't care if you're being shot at, your friends are there to support you and deserve appreciation. Hang in there, sweetie, you've done nothing wrong.

Berlin said:
But real love survives! And I am sure we will!

That's what we like to hear! Keep being brave :)
 

PS

A-List Customer
Messages
448
Location
PA
Ladies you are right. Before she went in she told me about the card she has to use for things she may need. Her mom even looked at her bank account and she has used her debit card on base.
I did send what she asked for. I threw it all in a box and with a mean note attached. The toilet paper really made me mad! Like, really? Do you expect me to believe those without push over families have to wipe their behinds with their hands? Seriously. I am very hurt that she chose to speak to me that way esp because she has the money for the things she needs. My husband thinks its rude that I have the receipts. If she really wants to push me I will send her a bill. I mean having your hair fall in your face during pushups will not get you re started. UGH.
 

MissJeanavive

One of the Regulars
Messages
157
Location
San Francisco, CA
35 days and accounting till I am officially a military wife (reservists) but we already have been on countdowns for possible deployment to meet the demand for Afghanistan. Already the wives are wanting to meet me and have me join the local organization.

I had already adopted two active units in Afghanistan and have been doing care packages that have been well received. Its a numbers game for us with his contract being up in 2012, he is not career and has a family company to run here in the states around the end of the contract.

BTW: They just gave him another version of the swine flu vaccine, first one was a spray, this time a shot...my mom's a nurse and use to work at the VA's and said don't be surprised one day if he comes home glowing in the dark they have always used our soldiers as front line trials...

His family and my family have had a military history...my uncle was in Pacific Theater WWII Navy, and my dad could not join because of health reasons, which I think made us twice as patriotic...flag was hung, we folded it religiously in the evenings in the garage and I was required to have a coin bounce on the bed for inspection (especially when my uncle came over).

I look forward with corresponding with you all as we stand proud and tall of our men.
 

C-dot

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,908
Location
Toronto, Canada
MissJeanavive said:
35 days and accounting till I am officially a military wife (reservists) but we already have been on countdowns for possible deployment to meet the demand for Afghanistan. Unit has made me honorary 'tags' and already the wives are wanting to meet me and have me join the local organization.

Congratulations to you! Camaraderie is the best soother to apprehension - Knowing there are others out there who understand and are there to support you. I do hope your FDH doesn't have to go overseas, especially not before your wedding. Be sure to show us pictures of the happy occasion :)

I am glad I revived this thread... Unfortunately I am no longer eligible to post in it. My soldier and I broke our engagement before Christmas. The last I heard from him, he was volunteering for deployment.
As heartbroken as I am, I would like the ladies to know I am still here to support you.
 

MissJeanavive

One of the Regulars
Messages
157
Location
San Francisco, CA
C-dot, thank you. My fiance broke up with me 4 times over the course of a year and a half...and it was based on fears that I wouldn't wait (women cheat, fellow tips from soldiers), and that its not right to leave someone at home...many many men will break up because of this, as confirmed by a friend who is a desert storm vet (now undercover cop)...who I talked to about the break up he said the minute he gets there he is going to need you most and he will reach out...have heart and "don't give up on your soldier" - than went on to tell me how to sneak booze into the care packages.

Even if this isn't the formula for you I suggest you still adopt a unit and put your heart into helping others who are there...I would suggest you keep in touch with his parents as well, who will know his info...I am sure you went into this relationship preparing to be the women at home, who would be strong and dedicated - don't loose that energy...though he may have taken away your option to wait for him...don't let that be the deal breaker. If you love him, you would have had to wait anyways...its not like he is leaving you for another women he is leaving you for his duties...and it is very very very hard for them to stay behind when their comrades are leaving - which probably led to the volunteering...but this doesn't mean cut yourself off from the world either...

My two cents.
 

ColeV48

Familiar Face
Messages
62
Location
Omaha
My husbands been in the Navy for about a year-and-a-half now. He just finished with all of his schooling and is about ready to go onto a ship. Unfortunately, that means he'll be on a long deployment right away.
It certainly does test any relationship! I hear all sorts of horror stories of wives/girlfriends. The navy even does all it can to discourage their sailors from signing over any access to their money. It's really sad, especially since it makes all of the SOs back home suspect.
 

Harp

I'll Lock Up
Messages
8,508
Location
Chicago, IL US
Berlin said:
Yes, I am an army wife.
My man serves the green berets. We call it 'Korps Commando troepen' in the Netherlands.


Special Forces, obviously a great guy. :D
All the best to your Green Beret. :eusa_clap
 

*martini*time*

A-List Customer
Messages
312
Location
Edmonton, Canada
C-dot said:
Congratulations to you! Camaraderie is the best soother to apprehension - Knowing there are others out there who understand and are there to support you. I do hope your FDH doesn't have to go overseas, especially not before your wedding. Be sure to show us pictures of the happy occasion :)

I am glad I revived this thread... Unfortunately I am no longer eligible to post in it. My soldier and I broke our engagement before Christmas. The last I heard from him, he was volunteering for deployment.
As heartbroken as I am, I would like the ladies to know I am still here to support you.

I too cannot post in here anymore...I am no longer a military girlfriend. I consider my now dead relationship my time done in the military. I am still here to support you wonderful ladies. As the old addage goes, "behind every strong man, is a stronger woman" and you ladies are as strong as they get.
 

SayCici

Practically Family
Messages
813
Location
Virginia
C-dot and *martini*time*, I'm so sorry to hear about your break-ups! :( Let me know if there's something I could do for you.
 

SayCici

Practically Family
Messages
813
Location
Virginia
I thought I'd post a picture of my husband in his newly acquired flight suit because I don't think I've ever shared a photo of him:
4648243574_87f9a065a1.jpg


He's a ham, there are a hundred other photos like this, haha.
 

ColeV48

Familiar Face
Messages
62
Location
Omaha
Too cute SayCici! I don't think Evan would let me take pictures of him, let alone in his dress blues. I'll have to trick him sometime (you know, when he's actually home).
 

Forum statistics

Threads
107,217
Messages
3,031,284
Members
52,690
Latest member
biker uk
Top