The "Annoying Phrase" Thread

Discussion in 'The Observation Bar' started by Lady Day, Apr 21, 2009.

  1. Bamaboots

    Bamaboots

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    Wow!
     
  2. tonyb

    tonyb I'll Lock Up

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    The fatter the better.
     
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  3. Aww nuts. I was just being a wiseguy when I quoted that line from The Odd Couple last night, but re-reading it now makes me want a corned beef sandwich. :(



    :p
     
  4. ChiTownScion

    ChiTownScion Call Me a Cab

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    Best cop humor incident I ever witnessed was in court one day when I was appointed to represent some suburban yahoo who was heading home on Addison at Clark after witnessing a home team victory @ Wrigley- and consuming far too much beer for his own good. The officer in question was female, blonde, quite attractive, and detailed that day from the 9th District (Bridgeport): while crossing the street he decided to give her buns a nice squeeze... and was, of course, arrested for misdemeanor battery.

    Defendant was quite contrite in court, all apologies: he pled guilty, and was about to receive his one year court supervision, when yours truly approached the officer during a short recess.

    "I'm going to have to submit a statistic on this one, officer, and I need your input: was Mr.____ 'copping a feel,'.... or was he 'feeling a cop?' "

    Everyone- including the judge- had a good laugh on that one.
     
  5. Lean'n'mean

    Lean'n'mean I'll Lock Up

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    ^^^^
    You probably had to be there to find that funny.:rolleyes:
     
  6. GHT

    GHT I'll Lock Up

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    Back in the 70's, a minor case made headline press when, in court, the defendant stood in the dock looking totally bored, hands in his pockets, just standing there, chewing gum.

    This infuriated the judge, who called the jailer, (a term given to the court usher.) "Jailer, instruct the defendant to stop masticating." The jailer looked across at the belligerent young man in the dock, then shouted: "Oi, you, take your hands out of your pockets."

    Such was the hilarious uproar, the judge called for a ten minute recess.
     
  7. Lean'n'mean

    Lean'n'mean I'll Lock Up

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    Did it have a happy ending ?
     
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  8. GHT

    GHT I'll Lock Up

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    Did it have a happy ending? If I could only remember the details I might be able to find it on line. I do remember the downmarket press having great fun with masturbate and masticate. I bet the cartoonists had a good day with it too.
     
  9. Lean'n'mean

    Lean'n'mean I'll Lock Up

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    Yeah, I've heard that when a fella masticates he likes a happy ending....no idea if it's true or not. :rolleyes:
     
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  10. GHT

    GHT I'll Lock Up

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    "He turned round and said." Why does someone have to turn round before speaking. A neighbour of ours is always using the phrase. Another infuriating expression that our neighbour uses is: "I'm not one to gossip." Not much!
     
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  11. vitanola

    vitanola I'll Lock Up

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    Up here, some officers have fun with the old stereotype (and make some money on the side)

    https://copsdoughnuts.com/about/
     
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  12. LizzieMaine

    LizzieMaine Bartender

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  13. tonyb

    tonyb I'll Lock Up

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    “Your call is important to us.”
     
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  14. GHT

    GHT I'll Lock Up

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    That's why we have an automated system to reassure you that you are very important. We know that without your custom we wouldn't have a business, so we instruct this phone messaging gopher to keep complimenting you so that you won't get exasperated, but if you do the program has been carefully construed not to lose it's temper. We do understand your frustration and we hope that we have given you every reassurance that we have your best interests at heart.

    You silly, sad, pathetic loser, you.
     
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  15. GHT

    GHT I'll Lock Up

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    "The Fact of the Matter" What kind of gobble-de-gook is that? The fact of the matter is, you don't know what you are talking about, nor when to shut up.
    Giving It 110%. This is, without doubt, the kind of gibberish loved by sports players, TV announcers and morons who didn't pay attention at school.
    "On the same page." My Godson cracked me up when he told me that it's now morphed into: On the same app. You know how annoying it is when some people are using WhatsApp and others are using Viber or Signal or whatever. “Can we meet before the presentation so we’re all on the same app?”
    If anyone can translate WhatsApp, Viber & Signal, it would be appreciated.
     
    Last edited: Oct 1, 2019
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  16. Boomerang

    Boomerang One of the Regulars

    Messages:
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    Location:
    Washington State
    This one may be too personal, but I'll submit it for Lounger approval:

    "Solve for x."

    Fine if x is the only letter, and numbers flesh-out the equation. If you want me to solve for x in a sea of alphabet soup, however...
     
  17. LizzieMaine

    LizzieMaine Bartender

    Whenever I hear "VIP," I reach for my pistol, FIGURATIVELY SPEAKING OF COURSE.

    Very Impatient Person. Very Insufferable Pissant. Very Irritating Poltroon.
     
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  18. GHT

    GHT I'll Lock Up

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    "Don't try this at home." There was a time when kids instinctively knew that it would be stupid to try and do the things depicted in cartoons.
    It seems that no matter how impossible it would be to copy, a disclaimer has to accompany it for fear of litigation.
    coyote.jpg
     
  19. Benny Holiday

    Benny Holiday My Mail is Forwarded Here

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    It's like when they banned the Three Stooges from TV here because it was "too violent" and "kids might think it's okay to poke each other in the eyes and hit one another over the head." Funny, all the kids I grew up with watched the Sttoges in the 70s and 80s and never once did it occur to any of us that it was anything other than cartoon shenanigans that of course aren't real. Boy did we laugh though! How stupid have people got to be?
     
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  20. "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has it's limits."
    Unknown
     
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