Wool felt hat dyeing disaster

[bumphrey hogart]

So,looking on the 'bay' at trilbys(fedoras for you chaps across the pond) and find a 'Lock & co' in my size apparently going for a song,(for anyone who doesn't know locks are the oldest hatmakers in the world,started in 1670 odd, and they're not cheap). Well,no alternative but to have a go,they come up so rarely,especially in the right size it'd be rude not to. Must mention it comes with a lock hat box,these are 40 quid($60) on their own,but the woman selling doesn't know what model it is and the pictures aren't great in the ad,so it could be one of half a dozen.(The cheapest of which is £185/$280).
I get the hat and box for £75,result! It arrives very fast,and the hats brand new, it's still got a bit of the plastic sales tag in it,now to find out what model it is. So I ring locks and describe the hat and it turns out it's the 'voyager', a foldable travel fur felt(check locks site).
Now I already have a 'rambler', a lock wool felt foldable,and they're both brown, even I can't justify two brown foldable trilbys and so I come up with the bright idea of dyeing the wool felt black,well it's wool,wool dyes doesn't it? S**t,should have thought about it really,what a cock up. I paid £95/$150 for this hat new,I loved this hat.
Well I think it's going to be wearable,It's half the size it was but after fighting with it most of last night I've made a reasonable looking small brimmed porkpie, the colour took a bit,now it's slightly darker brown and in all honesty, looking on the bright side,I haven't got a dark brown,wool felt, foldable porkpie.
So I suppose the moral is, 'If you've got two brown,foldable,lock trilbys and you fancy a black one,put your hand in your bloody pocket'!

 

[Bourne ID]

OMG that is sooo funny!!!! I've got tears in my eyes I laughed so hard. I washed a winter stocking hat that my wife had knitted for me and threw it in the dryer. Now it looks a yarmulke (yamaka)!!!!!!!

 

[DanielJones]

Man, that is sad, yet oddly funny at the same time. Do you have any pictures of before and after the dye bath?

Cheers!

Dan

 

[bumphrey hogart]

Aah have managed to wrench the wretched keyboard away from the recently technophobic bumphrey in order to report that indeed the felt hat dying episode was an epic. There was I - kids gone for the weekend, hey I thought to myself,; food, wine, man (he really is a male) and ... disaster.... "darling, don't need two brown felt hats, just going to dye one". Two hours later and much swearing (I have long given up and put pj's on over the la perla), starving (food!), in comes Bumphrey - can't stop have a tiny pixie hat to do something with!!!!!!! Even our cat looked disgusted and believe me he would wear anything! Called emergency services - strangely they weren't interested - by this time Bumphrey is looking remarkably purple - yoga I cleverley thought - neigh said the cat - he had a bit part in a talking horse series - can't remember what it was called (Mr Ed?). Anyway I digress - the evening was a disaster - please, please don't ever try to dye your hat ---- ever. This is a lesson to be learnt - take it from me - you cannot mix hat-dying with a real relationship with a real person who in no way resembles a hat!!

 

[bumphrey hogart]

So,the hat is now dry and it is an unmitigated disaster! Though the shape is ok for a porkpie there is no stiffness in the brim now it's dry,it's all a bit wavy,it just doesn't look right. It needs wetting and stretching again,come on chaps,help,someone must have come across this before,or am I really the only one stupid enough to have tried this?(Even if it's true,really don't need an affirmative answer to that last question).
Alternatively the name of a hatter who might be willing to take this on.Cheers.
Oh,pictures,afraid I wouldn't know where to start,don't have a camera and if I did wouldn't have a clue how to get a photo onto a computer.

 

[facade]

So,the hat is now dry and it is an unmitigated disaster! Though the shape is ok for a porkpie there is no stiffness in the brim now it's dry,it's all a bit wavy,it just doesn't look right. It needs wetting and stretching again,come on chaps,help,someone must have come across this before,or am I really the only one stupid enough to have tried this?(Even if it's true,really don't need an affirmative answer to that last question).
Alternatively the name of a hatter who might be willing to take this on.Cheers.
Oh,pictures,afraid I wouldn't know where to start,don't have a camera and if I did wouldn't have a clue how to get a photo onto a computer.

Sounds to me like you washed out all the stiffening agents in the felt.

http://www.villagehatshop.com/hat_stiffener.html

I wonder if it may be best to donate this hat to the nearest scarecrow or snowman at this point.

 

[bumphrey hogart]

Sounds to me like you washed out all the stiffening agents in the felt.

http://www.villagehatshop.com/hat_stiffener.html

I wonder if it may be best to donate this hat to the nearest scarecrow or snowman at this point.

You're probably right,it's just bloody heartbreaking,I've got plenty more but you get attached to hats don't you, and it wasn't a cheap hat either. Oh well,serves me right,should have left well alone,bloody big lesson to learn!

 

[Bourne ID]

Thanks for the additional chapters of this story! I can feel your anguish come to life through your words.....it's still a very funny read. My children have suggested that you cut some ear holes and give it to the dog!! I believe he has long been envious of your styling good looks while out for a walk!