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Violent reaction to first hat

gimmesomeshelte

Familiar Face
Messages
79
Location
San Carlos, CA
All-

I tried to wear my first fedora (a little stingy brim I bought this weekend) in the presence of my kids. Talk about a violent reaction! My daughter thought the color was all wrong, the crown was too big (4 in.) and the brim was too narrow (1 7/8). My boy grabbed it off my head and wouldn't let me put it back on (thank *** I wasn't wearing a big buck Optimo!) I ended up going out without anything on.

Is this kind of reaction very common (my kids are 12 and 15)? Should I try to acclimate my children to the idea of their dad wearing something other than a baseball cap slowly, or should I just tell them that if they want to eat, they're going to have to accept my newfound passion?

Thanks for your time.

Paul-
 

Aerol

A-List Customer
Messages
303
Location
Chicago, IL
Style

Your daughter might be worth listening to. The hat may be wrong for you and the "big buck Optimo" that was made for youmay actually be a better investment. My 19 year old daughter likes my hats...and yes, they are Optimos.

Teenage boys are fools and should be treated as such. They have no idea of style, only fashion. (Style is timeless, fashion changes daily) It's your job to teach him the difference.

Last week's issue of Time Out Chicago had a cover article on the latest styles. All the male models were wearing either Optimos or vintage Borsos. It looks like our Style is returning to Fashion.
 

Pilgrim

One Too Many
Messages
1,719
Location
Fort Collins, CO
The only fashion teens are aware of is whatever their teen friends are wearing. They generally haven't a clue about anything that was invented more than 12 months ago.

Wear the hat and tell him in a gentle but firm manner that it's none of his business. You have MUCH better judgement than a teen-ager does.
 

J.B.

Practically Family
Messages
677
Location
Hollywood
Remember...

...Confucius say: Grandchildren is reward for not killing children.


:whistling
 

Magus

Practically Family
Messages
655
Location
Southern California
Maybe they are not up with current fashion...

Tell them that the "Peas" say "Shut up" ;) If its good enough for them, then its good enough for dad.

http://ee.1asphost.com/7717171/black_eyed_peas.jpg

Though purists may not like the way new generations are wearing fedoras, there is no doubt that the fedora is "in" right now. Maybe your kids are behind the times? lol

On a more serious note I am a musician and work with youth a lot and the youth culture. As a result I tend to dress "young" and "off beat" clothing has been a hallmark for me. I say that to encourage you to wear what you wish. Ask your son if he would apreciate it if the next time he had on something you didn't care for (pants too low/high/tight/loose or t-shirt with the wrong/inapropriate logo on it) that you wrestled him to the ground and yanked it off his body? Respect is respect. Perhaps perspective is needed for the young man? You would know better than I by far as you have raised him.

Put the hat on and if you and your wife care for it....thats all that is needed.

Just my thoughts, your mileage may vary.

M
 

Mike in Seattle

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,027
Location
Renton (Seattle), WA
Here's what I'd do. The next time one of your kids wants to go out in something that looks completely ridiculous, which they of course thinks absolutely the coolest thing ever, tell them they have to change. When they whine (and they will) simply say "You complained about my hat and refused to let me wear it out. You imposed your taste on me - now I'm returning the favor." And then you explain about personal style, personal taste and how boring the world would be if we all dressed alike, etc.

And in a perfect world, I'd then tell them "So here are your outfits..." A nice little 40's pinafore, pigtails, white gloves, bobby sox & Buster Browns for her; knickerbockers, shirt & bowtie, newsboy cap for him...
 

Twitch

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,133
Location
City of the Angels
Maybe you did look goofy and the kids were right. Did you try showing them different brim positions and angles of the hat on the head for what might have looke dbetter on you?:cool2:
 

D. Hats

One of the Regulars
Messages
108
Location
Agoura Hills, Ca.
gimmesomeshelter...

I have 5 kids... 3 girls and 2 boys ranging from 16 to 9.
Since I started wearing fedoras and more specifically since I've purchased several via ebay auctions resulting in a few being slightly TOO Small (which I then give to them)... both of my sons think they're cool (The Fedoras) and on many occassions wear them to school and out to the movies and other various gatherings.
Many of the schools here in SoCal really don't allow baseball caps out of fear they may be a symbol of some gang affiliation... if the kids wear baseball caps to school they're often persuaded to remove them. In the case when my boys wear fedoras to school they have received compliments from the teachers.
It may be true that you've just chosen for your first attempt a lid that just doesn't suit you, i.e., color, size, brim, etc. I think once your kids start noticing that there are plenty of younger folks starting to sport classy lids they'll come around... wait 'til your son hears a young lady make a positive comment about some cool guy wearing a fedora and he'll be wearing one himself. :cool2:
 
Messages
11,579
Location
Covina, Califonia 91722
Respect for Elders!

gimmesomeshelte said:
My boy grabbed it off my head and wouldn't let me put it back on. Paul-
********
I know that my nose would have been relocated to next to my ear in a quick and authoritative one handed manner by my dad, if I ever did something like that to my dad. Of course, I never would have even considered doing it to begin with! My respect for my Dad would not allow that type of teasing. His position of head of the household would not allow it.

Fact 2: I have never, ever seen my dad wear Blue Jeans. The least dressy pant he wore were chinos.
 

jake_fink

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,279
Location
Taranna
Kids are always right. Parents are always wrong.*

So you must stop wearing hats. Sorry.

*I learned that from TV.
 
John in Covina said:
********
I know that my nose would have been relocated to next to my ear in a quick and authoritative one handed manner by my dad, if I ever did something like that to my dad. Of course, I never would have even considered doing it to begin with! My respect for my Dad would not allow that type of teasing. His position of head of the household would not allow it.

I see you had a father like mine. Heheheheheh! My father would have done the same thing. Then there was the time I indirectly called him an old geezer.......:eek: That never happened again. :p
My friends were scared to death of him and they made sure to be on their best behavior. :p It was funny to see them that way because I knew my father better than they did. He was tough but as long as the line was not crossed there were no problems---and you KNEW where that line was 24/7. :D The ole ex-Marine demanded respect but he also earned it by setting an example.
I suppose fear is right up there with respect. lol

Regards to all,

J
 

maintcoder

A-List Customer
Messages
320
Location
WA
Both my daughters (18 and 15) like my hats and style - something I found funny because I worried about them not accepting the decision I made to wear hats. Frankly, I expected them to pull the old 'walk three paces behind or in front, but I won't be seen with you' type of deal. Instead, they were all over the old man showing him off... :)
 
Messages
11,579
Location
Covina, Califonia 91722
There was a Fear of God aspect to it, for sure.

Bill Cosby said to his son after some infraction, "I can kill you dead and make another on that looks just like you!"

Also, there was a line about pushing mom's buttons, too. I didn't worry about what mom would do, but what Dad would do when he got home. Dad was a quick tempered guy when it came to any sass from the kids, retribution was at time both quick and terrible in a Shock and Awe type of thing, not as much hurt as stunned at the ferociousness that seem to explode out of dad. No bruises, maybe a welt on the butt or two. But also very very infrequent and not with out reason. Usually, if we or I got out of line when we were out of the house shopping or at a restaurant, a look would often stop stuff, or a word, but if we wasn't paying attention, my dad would give a flick of the middle finger to the top of our heads as an attention getter and a warning.
 

Fedorista

Familiar Face
Messages
73
gimmesomeshelte said:
All-

I tried to wear my first fedora (a little stingy brim I bought this weekend) in the presence of my kids. Talk about a violent reaction! My daughter thought the color was all wrong, the crown was too big (4 in.) and the brim was too narrow (1 7/8). My boy grabbed it off my head and wouldn't let me put it back on (thank *** I wasn't wearing a big buck Optimo!) I ended up going out without anything on.

Is this kind of reaction very common (my kids are 12 and 15)? Should I try to acclimate my children to the idea of their dad wearing something other than a baseball cap slowly, or should I just tell them that if they want to eat, they're going to have to accept my newfound passion?

Thanks for your time.

Paul-

Help is out there
 

gimmesomeshelte

Familiar Face
Messages
79
Location
San Carlos, CA

Pilgrim

One Too Many
Messages
1,719
Location
Fort Collins, CO
My parents were good role models (mom still is, although fading fast) and they were talkers. That's the approach I take with my kids, too. I'm not there to give ultimatums (ultimata?), but to talk through things.

As mentioned above, I think the incident would pose a nice opportunity to discuss who gets to make decisions about what others wear. When the tables are turned, kids can identify with the problem.

And that hat gives you a definite Bruce Willis air. I think it's a good fit for you.
 

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