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The tie, a date-killer??

Feraud

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Hardlucksville, NY
Whoda thunk it?
LA Times supplement story by J.R. Meohringer.

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Paisley

I'll Lock Up
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5,439
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Indianapolis
I think the date was just the last straw.

Mr. Moehringer should do what women have been doing for years: save his ties for the time when they come back in style.

BTW, what paper was this in? It sounds like he's in New York City. They don't wear ties there much? I work in downtown Denver, and I see a lot of men in ties.
 
Have to agree - rather cowardly. I believe the problem is not with the necktie, but with the 'rep' necktie and the American Trad jackets, suits, trousers that go with it. If I walked into a bar and saw a gaggle of businessmen dressed like that, I would think 'squares' too. Then again, I, myself, must be pretty square to use a word like square.

Regards,

Senator Jack: A Quinn/Martin Production
 

scotrace

Head Bartender
Staff member
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14,382
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Small Town Ohio, USA
Out here on the steppes, we wear them quite a lot.

Great article! If more and more writers are bemoaning the loss of grace and civility... perhaps it isn't gone after all.
 

Feraud

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Hardlucksville, NY
scotrace said:
Great article! If more and more writers are bemoaning the loss of grace and civility... perhaps it isn't gone after all.

I agree with the point and think writers should be taking the offensive rather than the defense when it comes to writing articles.

In the above article the author is defending his choice of wearing a tie from a person who shows up on a first date wearing jeans and flats.
I would structure my article around the fact that the person showed up on a first date in jeans and flats. ;)
Let me title the article, "Jeans and Flats, A date-killer."
 

Miss Neecerie

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The land of Sinatra, Hoboken
Feraud said:
I agree with the point and think writers should be taking the offensive rather than the defense when it comes to writing articles.

In the above article the author is defending his choice of wearing a tie from a person who shows up on a first date wearing jeans and flats.
I would structure my article around the fact that the person showed up on a first date in jeans and flats. ;)


In the poor unknown girl's defence...he does say it was a 'mid-day coffee date'.

That's hardly a date, let alone a 'first date' level of date....that's a 'Vet the guy you met online to see he isn't a total idiot or axe murderer' date....not a DATE.

and whats wrong with flats...damn...not all of us can wear heels constantly you know...?
 

Daisy Buchanan

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BOSTON! LETS GO PATRIOTS!!!
I think this is so sad:(
I live in Boston, there are plenty of ties for the gents who work downtown, or in banking:D but I'm pretty sure that most all other business call for a casual work environment.
Besides, this was just one girls opinion. He shouldn't just give up after only one date. However, this girl should have been more understanding. When you meet a guy for coffee in the middle of the day, he is more than likely coming from work, and probably has to do back to work. So, changing is not convenient, IMO it certainly isn't necessary. So, she shouldn't have been surprised that this guy, who she's meeting in the middle of the work day, is wearing a suit! Some guys do still wear suits to work!!!
Even before I got into vintage I have always loved a man in a tie, add the suit and I'm gaga! They are the height of masculine fashion, they are one of the few items (except for that bad fad in the 80's when girls wore them) that set the men from the ladies. Women wear suits, they wear pant suits, yes they are more tailored and fit to a woman's curve, but look at an office that still requires a high level of dress code, you'll see a sea of suits on both men and women, what sets them apart?? The tie!!

I have another opinion on this girl he had the date with, she wasn't a very understanding person, maybe didn't have the most open mind. Would she have been happier if he had shown up in a velour track suit? Probably. However, she should have been able to figure out the circumstance behind what he was wearing, without making him feel uncomfortable about it. Again, he was coming straight from work. She's just one of those cookie cutter girls who follows todays fashion mags and probably expects all others to follow the crowd just like she does.

OR, maybe he's not at all nearly as cute as he thinks he is. The look of disgust wasn't towards his tie, that's just where her eyes landed because she couldn't bare to look at his face!!!:D So, this article, based on the tie, is really a bunch of misunderstood nonsense. The girl is probably reading it today and thinking "gosh, what is this guy talking about? I love a guy in a suit, doesn't he realize it was actually him I was making the funny face at" "Oh great, now guys are gonna stop wearing ties too! All because of this silly loser who is so blinded that he actually thinks he himself couldn't be the problem and he has to base it on something silly like what he's wearing" "He's a bigger loser than I thought!""!!!!!
 

Fletch

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Some guys still DO wear suits to work. Said suits are in a particularly boring phase right now (look at all the black), and so are the appropriate shirts and ties. At the same time the role of the suit, coat and tie outfit has also been made narrower. It is less about elegance or style now, and more about obligation and rote behavior.

The vested suit got stereotyped right out of fashion in the 80s. The last big glut of them were all made for day wear by middle management meatballs. Low-to-mid-priced, dark blue or grey, 2-button + 5-button vest, white or light grey pinstripe worsteds. Pinstripe often meant vest, but vest always meant pinstripe. These still turn up on eBay.

I can imagine the same thing happening to the suit itself. If you like linear extrapolation of trends, in another generation, suits may mostly be like cheap tuxedos, adjustable with cheesy metal buckles and snaps and mostly all alike. And the clip-on tie may rule again.
 

patrick1987

One of the Regulars
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Rochester
Rudeness, a date-killer

It's the culture of sarkiness. She: "I'm going to look at you in horror because you look like my dead grandfather even though I'd actually be lucky to have a date with that kind of guy instead of a 30-year-old sk8boi but since I'm so cool I can't express that because that would mean I care and it's uncool to care so your tie is stupid."
 

Fletch

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Iowa - The Land That Stuff Forgot
patrick1987 said:
It's the culture of sarkiness. She: "I'm going to look at you in horror because you look like my dead grandfather even though I'd actually be lucky to have a date with that kind of guy instead of a 30-year-old sk8boi but since I'm so cool I can't express that because that would mean I care and it's uncool to care so your tie is stupid."
He: <gravelly little Brando-wannabe head voice> "You have beautiful eyes.



B**ch."

She: <swoons>
 

Lee Lynch

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154
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Dallas, Texas
Fletch said:
Some guys still DO wear suits to work. Said suits are in a particularly boring phase right now (look at all the black), and so are the appropriate shirts and ties. At the same time the role of the suit, coat and tie outfit has also been made narrower. It is less about elegance or style now, and more about obligation and rote behavior.

The vested suit got stereotyped right out of fashion in the 80s. The last big glut of them were all made for day wear by middle management meatballs. Low-to-mid-priced, dark blue or grey, 2-button + 5-button vest, white or light grey pinstripe worsteds. Pinstripe often meant vest, but vest always meant pinstripe. These still turn up on eBay.

I can imagine the same thing happening to the suit itself. If you like linear extrapolation of trends, in another generation, suits may mostly be like cheap tuxedos, adjustable with cheesy metal buckles and snaps and mostly all alike. And the clip-on tie may rule again.

I would have just interpreted her response to indicate incompatibility, and move on without a whimper. Some women are relieved to see a man actually bothering to look good, what with all the low-brow grunge and hip-hop junk styles floating about. It's always sort of depressing to see the image projected on television of some really gorgeous woman dressed to the teeth with a trashed out doofus with his backward bill-cap and unshaven face.

I wear a few suits to work, and have encountered a mixture of opposition and compliments. I did tone it down some for the comfort level of others (no need to ruin my career over it), but for the most part I defer to the compliments and keep on going. I was actually told by a superior that I bumped up the dress standards there a little by example, which was a great compliment. I work in a nice, new office building, why not look nice? Some women wear suits there, and the men go part of the way with that dress jacket-and-jeans look, which looks like they got confused while dressing.

I've noticed that those who voiced reservations about my being "too dressed up for this place" were the ones who dress the worst, in t-shirts with wear and holes and half-hearted grooming efforts.

I get VERY puzzled looks when I assert that dress pants are so much more comfortable than jeans. Perhaps it is the fact that one can do more in jeans without ruining them but...we're in an office, not a landscaping crew.

Ok, I'll meet them halfway, but they will have to put up with the occasional suit.
 

Fletch

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We're in a bit of an "essentialist" phase lately w/r/t the "nature" of man and woman. The differences between the sexes are being celebrated to the point of exaggeration. Style is thus left mostly to the female. As a result, elegance is now somewhat unmasculine, unless it's the kind that's mostly about money.
 

Lee Lynch

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Fletch said:
We're in a bit of an "essentialist" phase lately w/r/t the "nature" of man and woman. The differences between the sexes are being celebrated to the point of exaggeration. Style is thus left mostly to the female. As a result, elegance is now somewhat unmasculine, unless it's the kind that's mostly about money.


I'm seeing gender styles as having gone very unisex, rather than a celebration of the difference of sexes. It seems mostly jeans and t-shirts for all. If anyone bothers to dress up at all, it seems to be the woman, with little or no expectation on the man to even look after his health, much less his looks. I do see what you mean by the exaggeration between the sexes sometimes. I can't decide who's fault this really is, but I err toward holding each responsible for his/her own dress habits.

**Edited here to correct my post, I misunderstood your post at first.**
 

Fletch

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Lee Lynch said:
If anyone bothers to dress up at all, it seems to be the woman, with little or no expectation on the man to even look after his health, much less his looks.
You strengthen my thesis, Lee. Once it becomes widely enough believed that "men are slobs," it follows that "men must be slobs - he who is not a slob is not a man."
 

Matt Deckard

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A devout capitalist in Los Angeles CA.
The tie is already out of sync with standard modes of dress unless you are a lawyer or a politician. California Lawyers don't often wear ties, though the tren I'd say is swaying toward dressing up again.

I get shuttled into clus when I wear a tie so it is still an emblem to those who recognize some sort of standards in our society.

Lastly, I think he was going out with the wrong gal. He needs a woman who appreciates ties. They aren't gone yet... though i do think they are going the way of the hat, I still wear mine.
 

Lee Lynch

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Fletch said:
You strengthen my thesis, Lee. Once it becomes widely enough believed that "men are slobs," it follows that "men must be slobs - he who is not a slob is not a man."


Agreed. I'm not sure if you got the corrected version of my post, in which I realized we agreed more on this than I had thought at first. I do indeed strengthen and uphold your thesis.

I was a bit confused at first on your post, as I most often see men and women dressed alike these days. I did not at first catch your meaning about the exaggeration of differences. I hope to live to see classy styles come back!
 

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