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Things You can't Do Anymore


A-List Customer
Pickleball Abandoned

Well, last week I attempted to play pickleball once again since giving it up when the pandemic began. About 10 minutes in, I began to wonder about my decision. Aches and pains prevailed everywhere. My 76 year old body was protesting to my 26 year old mind. After a week of constant aches and pains throughout, I went yesterday to see my Chiropractor instead of pickleball. It was a good choice. Today, most of the hurt has diminished or gone away completely, along with my desire to play a sport meant for a body in much less decay and in much better shape.

The list of things I can no longer do grows with each passing year. Pickleball is just another thing of the past for me.

Join me, and think back to things you used to do, and liked doing them, but no longer can. Share them with us, if you wish, or, "as you wish" as Wesley (Farm Boy) would have said.


One of the Regulars
The Texas Hill Country

For me, it's come to this.
Not that I'm complaining though.


My Mail is Forwarded Here
Heavy, structural black smithing is something I can’t really perform on a professional level anymore. A bit straightening, tension shaping or light forging and sheet metal forming is still possible but only one violent rebound with just a 1,5kg forging hammer is enough to screw up my wrist and finger joints for a week meanwhile. Just not enough steam in the sleeves for persistent control anymore.
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Tiki Tom

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Oahu, North Polynesia
Was a runner since my teens. Now I am too injury prone. After a couple of runs I’ll injure my knee or ankle or pull a muscle and have to stop for a week or two To heal. So… now I go for long walks instead, a couple of times a week. One hour per walk. Plus I try to swim laps at least once per week.


I'll Lock Up
New Forest

The Oldest Swinger In Town​

When you score with
a chick in a disco bar
take her home in
your hairy little car
Then you find you
went to school with
her Ma and PA
you're the oldest
swinger in town.

When you won't
look in a mirror
in the light of day
swear you dyed it
when your hair turns grey
When you zip up
your Wranglers and
your belly's in the way
you're the oldest
swinger in town.

Here you come
and there you go
wire wheel-spokes
and a stereo
But the engine's clapped
and the driver also
is the oldest
swinger in town.

When your barber takes
a little less time each week
the kids don't understand
a word you speak
When you walk into a disco
and they offer you a seat
you're the oldest
swinger in town.

You prefer a pint of beer
to Bacardi and coke
the sounds are too loud
and there's too much smoke
You'd like another dance
but you're scared
you'll have a stroke
you're the oldest
swinger in town.

Here you come
with your chest all bare
a little gold ingot
and a lot of gold hair
Like the disco king
meets Yogi bear
you're the oldest
swinger in town.

When you're feeling as
stiff as a skinhead's boot
rub on Vick where
you used to splash Brut
And the latest punk fashion
is your wedding suit
you're the oldest
swinger in town.

When you have
to go shopping
for your sex appeal
Travolta shades
and nine-inch heels
You say a man is just as old
as the woman he feels
you're the oldest
swinger in town.

Here you come with
your lips closed tight
you never smile
you know it
wouldn't look right
'Cause your dentures glow
in ultra-violet light
you're the oldest
swinger in town.

oldest swinger in town
And you look so mean
'cause your pants
are too tight
And it takes you all night
to do what you used
to do all night
you're the oldest
swinger in town...

Fred Wedlock was an English folk singer known for his UK hit single: "The Oldest Swinger in Town", but did you know that the song was covered by German comedian Karl Dall as "Der älteste Popper der Stadt".
Just doesn't have the same ring to it somehow!

steve u

A-List Customer
At 54 Eleven years ago , I lost my lower left leg and broke 20+ bones. There's a lot I can't do.
But having a 5 and 7 year old at home I went back to work after 6 month and 3 weeks.
We find a way to get by. Getting old isn't for the weak.


Practically Family
Nashville, TN
Bend over and pick something up when I drop it on the floor. Fortunately, I can no longer see well enough to notice when I drop something on the floor, so it all evens out.
I know what you mean... not my eyes, however. I can't seem to see much below the belt, it's all in a shadow. Likewise, if the dog's ball goes under the couch, between looking for a yard stick and getting down on my knees, it's quite a production.
vancouver, canada
From the point of one who is older, this does not change, nor does it improve.

It is unfortunate that the only alternative to being old is being dead.
I consider myself fortunate that I can do most things that I care to do. I played competitive baseball til I was 50 and I do miss that terribly. Switched to coaching and umpiring but gave that up in my early 60's. But I still do much of what I always did albeit at a much slower pace with a much longer recovery time. Mountain biking, hiking are still on the list. Arthritic knees have me holding the rail when ever I descend a staircase. Driving home at night in a heavy rainstorm poses issues so I joke to my wife that I find my home based on memory not sight. She laughs....nervously!

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