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Clean Jokes
- Thread starter jamespowers
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- Status
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Bonus points for double scenarios & meaning.
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GHT
I'll Lock Up
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- 9,350
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- New Forest
Done any Christmas shopping yet?
2jakes
I'll Lock Up
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- 9,680
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- Alamo Heights ☀️ Texas
Last edited:
GHT
I'll Lock Up
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- 9,350
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- New Forest
A woman and a baby waited in the doctor’s examining room, waiting for him to come in.
The doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight and commented the baby wasn’t gaining enough weight. He then asked if the baby was breastfed or bottle-fed.
“Breast fed,” the woman replied.
“Well, strip down to your waist,” the doctor ordered. She did.
He pressed, kneaded, and pinched both breasts for a while in a detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed he said, “No wonder this baby is hungry. You don’t have any milk.”
“I know,” she said, “I’m his Grandma … but I’m glad I came.”
The doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight and commented the baby wasn’t gaining enough weight. He then asked if the baby was breastfed or bottle-fed.
“Breast fed,” the woman replied.
“Well, strip down to your waist,” the doctor ordered. She did.
He pressed, kneaded, and pinched both breasts for a while in a detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed he said, “No wonder this baby is hungry. You don’t have any milk.”
“I know,” she said, “I’m his Grandma … but I’m glad I came.”
2jakes
I'll Lock Up
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- Alamo Heights ☀️ Texas
The pros and cons of choosing the cheapest medical health plan. 
drmaxtejeda
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- Mexico City
Vip
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Sent from my LG-H870 using Tapatalk
drmaxtejeda
I'll Lock Up
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- 8,329
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- Mexico City
X
Sent from my LG-H870 using Tapatalk
Sent from my LG-H870 using Tapatalk
2jakes
I'll Lock Up
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- 9,680
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- Alamo Heights ☀️ Texas
Location near my neck of the woods.
Happy Thanksgiving HJ.... save a
drumstick for me!
2jakes
I'll Lock Up
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- 9,680
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- Alamo Heights ☀️ Texas
bluesmandan
A-List Customer
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- United States
A different variation:
What odd number becomes more odd when you take away one letter?
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drmaxtejeda
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- Mexico City
Woodstock
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Sent from my LG-H870 using Tapatalk
2jakes
I'll Lock Up
- Messages
- 9,680
- Location
- Alamo Heights ☀️ Texas
Two guys are out hunting in the woods when one of them collapses.
He doesn’t appear to be breathing, his eyes are glazed over.
The other man pulls out his phone with trembling fingers and
calls 911.
He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?"
The operator says "Please stay calm. I will help you.
First of all, let's make sure he's dead."
There’s a silence, then a gun shot.
The guy gets back on the phone and says
"OK, now what?"
Btw:
My apologies if this has been posted
before.
But posting @ Fedota helps me to
forget I am @ hospital.
Cheers aii!
He doesn’t appear to be breathing, his eyes are glazed over.
The other man pulls out his phone with trembling fingers and
calls 911.
He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?"
The operator says "Please stay calm. I will help you.
First of all, let's make sure he's dead."
There’s a silence, then a gun shot.
The guy gets back on the phone and says
"OK, now what?"
Btw:
My apologies if this has been posted
before.
But posting @ Fedota helps me to
forget I am @ hospital.
Cheers aii!
drmaxtejeda
I'll Lock Up
- Messages
- 8,329
- Location
- Mexico City
2jakes
I'll Lock Up
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- 9,680
- Location
- Alamo Heights ☀️ Texas
I'm on third day and they are still poking
around. Worse was that mri procedure.
Felt like I was in a coffin already.
10 - 15 minutes was okay. But 45 minutes
was too much. I freaked out. They said they would have to start all over.
I said fine as long as I have the young
purty nurse inside with me.
Although she was willing the docters
declined my suggestion.
Today was allowed to eat solids.
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- 14,545
Hope they get it figured out and fixed soon @2jakes
Sorry about this, Jake. I'll be thinking of you and hope you are out and about soon. I have a few experiences with MRI's. No fun, drugs required.
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Doesn't sound like much of a benefit if it was hospital food.
I hope they figure things out and turn you loose soon.- Status
