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Remove your hat?

MattC

A-List Customer
Messages
424
Location
San Francisco and New York City
I know we've talked about this some before, but I wanted to see what people think these days. I was raised to think that a guy should always take off his hat indoors, particularly in restaurants, etc. But I've gotten very reluctant to give my hat to a check person. I've had a couple get badly mangled. And something in me cringes just watching a checker grab my hat by the front of the crown. For awhile, I only wore a stiff Akubra or Peter's Bros. Indy when going out, knowing it would be tough for even the most sadistic checker to hurt them. But I resent the idea of not being able to wear a nice hat out if I feel like it. Usually these days, if I wear a nice hat, I'll put my hat on a spare chair or window sill. But sometimes in the city there just isn't any room. In some places, I've just kept it on. Am I loosing my sense of decorum?
 

shindeco

A-List Customer
Messages
377
Location
Vancouver (the one north of M.K.)
Totally understand your feelings. I always take my hat off if I can but you can't always. There's not much you can do but leave it on. Hat removing only came into vogue when Victoria became queen, anyway. Before that, gentlemen would often wear their hats indoors so there IS an historic precedent.
 

BJD1880

New in Town
Messages
4
Location
Green River, Wyoming
Matt...

Like you, I was raised to remove my hat indoors, tip it to a lady, and never give it up to someone who'd abuse it!

In my part of the country it's not uncommon to see men sitting [with women] at a dining table wearing ball caps, cowboy hats or other headgear... and it surely rankles me. Good manners have gone by the wayside...
If the group doesn't include women it usually doesn't bother me as much-- but naggles a bit.

I STILL remove my hats indoors-- and will place them on a vacant chair, window ledge or even under my chair if there's no other place.
Still raise my hat to the ladies, too...

BJD
 

Biltmore Bob

Suspended
Messages
1,721
Location
Spring, Texas... Y'all...
BJD1880 said:
Matt...

Like you, I was raised to remove my hat indoors, tip it to a lady, and never give it up to someone who'd abuse it!

In my part of the country it's not uncommon to see men sitting [with women] at a dining table wearing ball caps, cowboy hats or other headgear... and it surely rankles me. Good manners have gone by the wayside...
If the group doesn't include women it usually doesn't bother me as much-- but naggles a bit.

I STILL remove my hats indoors-- and will place them on a vacant chair, window ledge or even under my chair if there's no other place.
Still raise my hat to the ladies, too...

BJD

Welcome, there Cowboy...I wouldn't let it bother you too much...ever go to a dance hall and dance with a lady and keep your hat on. Everybody here in Texas does it...'specially the Mexicans.

Nobody gives a rat's red behind anymore. Plus if I take it off I'll forget it, sit on it, or it will get piled on by a hundred jackets.
 

Kent Canary

New in Town
Messages
7
I went to a wedding and kept my hat on except for during the actual ceremony itself, though others kept theirs on.

Im pretty new to this game but I think you know when its right to kept it on and take it off.

I'll go now.
 

photobyalan

A-List Customer
Taking good care of your hat is the height of decorum. It's not your fault that boorish coat check people don't know how to treat it properly or that businesses don't wish to provide a proper place to hang your hat.

Etiquette doesn't exist in a vacuum. You are really only required to use as much etiquette as present-day society demands. Of course, you can choose to have better manners than the average person if you wish.

There are really only a few places any more (and this only goes for the United States, as I am not familiar with customs in other countries) where you have to worry about offending anyone if you don't remove your hat: Churches, courts of law, other people's homes and private offices, and anywhere when the national anthem is played (or the pledge of allegiance is recited). There may be a few others, but in general that's all the manners that are required in modern society. So few people know correct hat etiquette nowadays that you are not likely to ruffle many feathers if you follow the above guidelines. Again, you have the choice to do it right if you want, but it's quite possible no one will notice.:cry:
 

majormoore

Vendor
Messages
802
Most places do not even have a place that allows you to hang a hat on, I keep mine on, take it off in church and at the barber shop, and when the grand ole flag is being brought in at an event.

The other place I am having problems is at the airport, always have to take if off and some one that knows nothing about handling a hat garbs it and places it in the tub on the brim and allows all kinds of bags to come way to close. I have gone round and round with airport people on how they handle my hats. Telling them hold on, "that's a$600.00 dollar hat, damn'it be careful, they just look at you like a deer in the head lights.

Mike " Major Moore"
 

The Wingnut

One Too Many
Messages
1,711
Location
.
Coat racks and pegs are almost nonexistant now, similar to payphones. I remove my hat and keep it in hand if I pass into a private space or have to sit down. Coat checks are nonexistant, as well. In a restaurant, I usually end up having to place my hat on a ledge where I can keep an eye on it or place it in an empty chair. Same goes for my overcoat. I took the lady out on a date recently, and we both ended up placing our hats and coats on the chairs next to us.

I generally don't like anyone handling my hats. My Knox is in great shape, but the light gray vintage sweatband's stitching is beginning to come out. It's a soft crown, as well, and despite being easy to hand-bash back to shape, I'd rather not have to fuss with it before putting it on my head. There is, of course, the 'hur hur' factor, the obligatory nitwit that wants to try your hat on regardless of no mirror to see themselves in. I keep my hats under my control.

People still wear coats, yet most restaurants and other related businesses don't provide a place for them. You're somehow expected to find a spot to put your coat without displacing someone else. A coat rack or even peg costs little and even adds a bit to the decor.
 

shorel

New in Town
Messages
7
I'm not sure I was "raised" not to wear a hat indoors, it just feels weird to me and not something I would do.

I bought a Borsalino crushable so I can roll it up and put it in the sleeve of my overcoat or jacket when indoors, the way I do with caps. I had this very problem in mind when considering what kind of hat to get for everyday, around town activities that might find me wanting to sit down at a diner or a bar, for example.
 

Barry

Practically Family
Messages
693
Location
somewhere
I always take my hat off indoors.

The only time I didn't take it off indoors was when I was going through chemotherapy and didn't feel comfortable without it.

Barry
 
Messages
11,579
Location
Covina, Califonia 91722
Write the manager

If there are places your are going to go to that you know have a hat checker, send a couple of copies of a list of how to handle a hat to the manager or owner along with a note as to what you've had to deal with previously or what your fears are if you go to their establishment.

Also for places you might consider frequenting send them a note asking for hat and coat hooks to be installed. Sometimes we expect people to know what to do, but if you send a nice note and let them know what you would like or that you would really appreciate good handling techniques from the hat check person or accessable hat hooks for the area you are doing a great favor to the owner or manager letting them know what can be done to make the experience there better. And there is a big chance others will be in your debt also since they have not taken the oppourtunity to talk or write but have similar concerns.

You could do a work up in word and then be able to send it a a moments notice.

Sincerely,
Happy writing
 

Fedora

Vendor
Messages
828
Location
Mississippi
Until establishments have a place to safely keep a hat, it will stay on my head. At times in history it has been acceptable to keep ones hat on, and at other times vice versa. It is relative. Since hats are basically out of fashion, I say we create our own rules of hat etiquette. I say we still tip em' to the ladies, but otherwise it stays on. Shoes too. Fedora
 

Bud-n-Texas

Practically Family
Messages
975
Location
Central Texas (H.O.T.)
Here in the great state of Texas (National Champions I might add):cheers1: , in my part of the state, hat are very common. Western hats that is, even here there is rarely a hat rack available. I am proud of my hats and very protective as well. I do not worry a bit about a rainstorm, but do not subject them to spilled coffee or coke, food stains, or inconsiderate patrons or waiters. Makes no difference if its a western or a fedora, I take care of my lids.
 

Russ

One of the Regulars
Messages
209
Location
Tokyo
Hat pegs in the good old days

I just finished reading "Hatless Jack" and the author points out that the good old days were not much different from now in respect to men having to put their hats on their knee, or the chair beside them in restaurants because there were not any pegs or hat racks to be found. This meant half of the seats in a restaurant were taken up by hats, raher than paying customers.

Somebody observed this and came up with the first hat check service -- and became rich from the tips. After a few months Men would end up paying more money in tips than they paid for the hat in the first place.

Some restaurants have hat racks or pegs today, but who would want to use one unless he or she were sitting fairly close to it, just to keep an eye on the hat? Everybody sitting in the center of the room still have no choice but to use that extra chair or their knee. I wish somebody would invent a gadget you could strap on your knee to keep the hat hanging there under the table without sliding to the floor. Like a peg on a velcro strap.

I am old enough to remember my dad's fedora during the JFK administration. I once got car sick and used dad's hat for a different purpose, and he never bought another. So I am personally responsible for the death of the hat in our family!
:cry:
 

maintcoder

A-List Customer
Messages
320
Location
WA
I remember reading somewhere recently that if you want your hat to stay put and stay safe, leave it on your head unless your somewhere you can hold it. I recently had the misfortune to not heed that advice while downing a few martinis and smoking a cigar at the Metropolitan Grill here in Seattle (before the recent smoking ban) and a young lady almost crushed my hat with the oversize luggage she was toting around (she called it a purse). I saved my hat just in time, so from then on it has stayed on my head if there are no coat/hat pegs nearby.
 

Bebop

Practically Family
Messages
951
Location
Sausalito, California
I watched a coat check guy and his partner try on a hat that someone had left in their care and whoop it up while they thought no one was looking :rage: . It did take some getting used to but I don't give my hat to any hat check person and I don't give my car to some guy to park. Now I can't imagine letting someone I don't know go off with my hat or my car with the premise of taking care of them while I go do something else. I take my hat off only if I can hold it or put it on the seat next to me. Even if you go to a high class joint, most of the people there are not high class and they don't even care if you wear your hat during dinner.
 

Michael Mallory

One of the Regulars
Messages
283
Location
Glendale, California
I don't know any places that check hats anymore. Maybe I don't go to the right places. But as a rule of thumb, if you go to a restaurant, take your hat off while you eat, but if you're at a counter, you can leave it on.
 

Raindog

One of the Regulars
Russ said "I wish somebody would invent a gadget you could strap on your knee to keep the hat hanging there under the table without sliding to the floor. Like a peg on a velcro strap."

Easy to fabricate such a thing. Damn good idea russ. Make it out of light weight plastic or wood, thin design to slip in the pocket. Not only strappable to the knee but to chairs etc. I'll make one at work today.

I've thought about getting in a load of cheap plastic hat pegs, fixable by sticky pads (the really difficult to remove ones) and sticking one up next to my chair in restaurants. Leave it there when you go. When they try and remove it it'll take off a load of paper and plaster in the process. Next time you go in do it again. Eventually they'll leave it there :)


Jeff.
 

Doh!

One Too Many
Messages
1,079
Location
Tinsel Town
Whenever I see a twenty-something kid wearing his hat in a decent restaurant (usually a ballcap or woolen ski hat) I really feeling like going up to the girl he's with and saying, "You know, if I were your date I'd take my hat off for you."
 

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