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The Dumbest Comment I Ever Heard

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avedwards

Call Me a Cab
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2,425
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London and Midlands, UK
Good idea. Thank you. That will silence idiotic youths, as it will take them too long to think of a good responce; I am not exaggerating, as someone who thinks that only Inspector Gadget wears a fedora and trench coat is usually quite dumb.
 
avedwards said:
I frequently get called "Inspector Gadget" by idiots on the street when I wear my beige trench coat and grey fedora (and previoulsy black and tan fedoras too). Other than wearing a black great coat (which people don't comment on) I cannot think of anything to do against the fools.

Is "Inspector Gadget" the only trenchcoat-fedora wearing character they know of? Has nobody in modern Britain heard of Humphrey Bogart? Just because 90% of youths in Britain can think of nothing to wear other than a hoody, doesn't mean than I am going to conform.

So can anybody think of a good comeback to hoody wearing youths when they say Inspector Gadget? I have checked the amazing list but have not found any which quite fit the case. Any help would be greatly appreciated, so that I can battle the poorly dressed morons with words.

Snoop Dog is that you? or
Go, go Gadget idiot eliminator. :D
 

ortega76

Practically Family
Messages
804
Location
South Suburbs, Chicago
avedwards said:
I frequently get called "Inspector Gadget" by idiots on the street when I wear my beige trench coat and grey fedora (and previoulsy black and tan fedoras too). Other than wearing a black great coat (which people don't comment on) I cannot think of anything to do against the fools.

Is "Inspector Gadget" the only trenchcoat-fedora wearing character they know of? Has nobody in modern Britain heard of Humphrey Bogart? Just because 90% of youths in Britain can think of nothing to wear other than a hoody, doesn't mean than I am going to conform.

So can anybody think of a good comeback to hoody wearing youths when they say Inspector Gadget? I have checked the amazing list but have not found any which quite fit the case. Any help would be greatly appreciated, so that I can battle the poorly dressed morons with words.

Just carry a taser and respond with "Go Go Gadget Stun Gun". Then let them have it.
 

Big Man

My Mail is Forwarded Here
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3,781
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Nebo, NC
avedwards said:
... So can anybody think of a good comeback to hoody wearing youths when they say Inspector Gadget? ...

How about, "How's it going, Rocky?" (as in a boxer wearing a hooded sweat shirt)
 

avedwards

Call Me a Cab
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2,425
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London and Midlands, UK
Big Man said:
How about, "How's it going, Rocky?" (as in a boxer wearing a hooded sweat shirt)

I don't know if the degenerates will understand this, so I don't know if this comeback will be so effective, but thanks for the idea. I might use it on slightly more intelligent idiots.
 

Big Man

My Mail is Forwarded Here
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3,781
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avedwards said:
I don't know if the degenerates will understand this, so I don't know if this comeback will be so effective, but thanks for the idea. I might use it on slightly more intelligent idiots.

Good point (sadly).

But at least they will walk away thinking, "I wonder what that means?" [huh]
 

Charlz

Familiar Face
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54
Location
Tennessee
Oh let me try; These are all just in fun by the way.

What's with the hat?
Reply) It came with the holster.

Why the hat?
Reply) To protect my head from the brass casings.

Why are you wearing that?
Reply) So the CCTV doesn't get my face after the shooting.

Where'd ya get the stupid hat?
Reply) The gun shop.

You look dumb in that hat...
Reply) That's what my last victim said.

What are you?
Reply) A gun owner.

You know who you look like?
Reply) A violent felon?

You look like my grandfather...
Reply) Did he carry a gun too?

You look like Indiana Jones...
Reply) He carried a gun too!!!

You look like Dick Tracy.
Reply) What kind of gun did he carry?

You look like Freddy Krueger...
Reply) No knife glove, I carry a gun.

You look like a pimp...
Reply) Well, I do carry a gun.

You look like an undertaker.
Reply) I do keep them in business.

You look like _____.
Reply) ...........Well, I do carry a gun.

Are you supposed to be ______ ?
Reply) A guy with a gun.

I thought you were ______ ?
Reply) Well, I do carry a gun.

Godfather...
Reply) Godfather?! Did he carry a gun too?

Are you in the Mafia?
Reply) Well, I do carry a gun.

Are you in fancy dress?
Reply) Are you a rapist? I do carry a gun.

Are you religious?
Reply) Do you want to buy a flower? Oh and by the way I carry a gun.

What are you all dressed up for?
Reply) To cover my gun.

You're a bit overdressed...
Reply) Why is my gun showing?

Is your head cold?
Reply) No but this gun sure is.

Where's the funeral?
Reply) I have not killed anyone...yet.

"Weirdo" / "freak" / "dweeb" etc.
Reply) Shoot one person and you are labeled for life...dammit!

You're living in a dream world.
Reply) You are right you can't get rid of bodies like they do in the movies.

What happened to your hair?
Reply) Got blown back from the recoil of my gun.

It's stupid hat day today.
Reply) Nope, it's loaded gun day.

"Yee-haw!"
Reply) Geeez! you scared me! I almost shot you. Be more careful.
 

JohnnyB53

One of the Regulars
Messages
289
Location
Seattle, WA
avedwards said:
So can anybody think of a good comeback to hoody wearing youths when they say Inspector Gadget? I have checked the amazing list but have not found any which quite fit the case. Any help would be greatly appreciated, so that I can battle the poorly dressed morons with words.
If my hat makes me Inspector Gadget, your hoody makes you a serial killer.

I'd rather be mistaken for Inspector Gadget than a serial killer.

They're called clothes for grown-ups. Someday you may ... nah!

Ah, and you with a hoody and sagging pants. How imaginative! And look at that! You've accessorized your ensemble with a ball cap. How EVER do you come up with your fashion ideas?

And you're dressed to burgle a house, snatch a purse, or knock over a convenience store.

I'm wearing a coat and a hat, and you're at a loss for a cultural reference?

What are the cultural references for a hoody and a ball cap? The Unabomber? Son of Sam? Jeffrey Dahmer?
 

ortega76

Practically Family
Messages
804
Location
South Suburbs, Chicago
avedwards said:
I frequently get called "Inspector Gadget" by idiots on the street when I wear my beige trench coat and grey fedora (and previoulsy black and tan fedoras too). Other than wearing a black great coat (which people don't comment on) I cannot think of anything to do against the fools.

Is "Inspector Gadget" the only trenchcoat-fedora wearing character they know of? Has nobody in modern Britain heard of Humphrey Bogart? Just because 90% of youths in Britain can think of nothing to wear other than a hoody, doesn't mean than I am going to conform.

So can anybody think of a good comeback to hoody wearing youths when they say Inspector Gadget? I have checked the amazing list but have not found any which quite fit the case. Any help would be greatly appreciated, so that I can battle the poorly dressed morons with words.

"Do your baggy pants make it easier for the bigger felons to make you their girlfriend?"

Although that seems extreme and downright uncouth. I left some urchins fuming at this this afternoon while waiting for a train back home.
 

Big Man

My Mail is Forwarded Here
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3,781
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Nebo, NC
Not really a dumb comment, but a true story along those lines ...

First, some background information: I'm 6' - 6" tall and weigh about 360 lbs. I keep my hair cut in a "high and tight" cut, and always wear a suit and tie at work.

Now the story: I'm the Safety Director for a large psych hospital. Several years ago we were being surveyed by a regulatory agency. They weren't finding anything, so (as surveyors tend to do) they started to look deeper and deeper for something. There were several of us seated at a table in the conference room, when one of the surveyors in a real smug way said to me, "is that tie you are wearing a breakaway tie?" (meaning, if a patient grabbed my tie, would it "breakaway" so as to presumably not hurt me).

I looked at him and said, "no, it isn't."

To which he smugly said, "well, what if someone grabbed you and choked you."

I stood up, leaned across the table, looked him right in the eye and said, "go ahead and try to choke me."

The surveyor turned white as a ghost and our Hospital Director about fell out of his chair. It was a quite couple of seconds, but that surveyor didn't bother me any more. :D

Sometimes you just have to show them who's boss ...
 

ortega76

Practically Family
Messages
804
Location
South Suburbs, Chicago
Big Man said:
First, some background information: I'm 6' - 6" tall and weigh about 360 lbs. I keep my hair cut in a "high and tight" cut, and always wear a suit and tie at work.

Now the story: I'm the Safety Director for a large psych hospital. Several years ago we were being surveyed by a regulatory agency. They weren't finding anything, so (as surveyors tend to do) they started to look deeper and deeper for something. There were several of us seated at a table in the conference room, when one of the surveyors in a real smug way said to me, "is that tie you are wearing a breakaway tie?" (meaning, if a patient grabbed my tie, would it "breakaway" so as to presumably not hurt me).

I looked at him and said, "no, it isn't."

To which he smugly said, "well, what if someone grabbed you and choked you."

I stood up, leaned across the table, looked him right in the eye and said, "go ahead and try to choke me."

The surveyor turned white as a ghost and our Hospital Director about fell out of his chair. It was a quite couple of seconds, but that surveyor didn't bother me any more. :D

Sometimes you just have to show them who's boss ...

Bravo. My mom's a nurse and has had run-ins with a few regulatory folks with poor manners. Good job on showing them who is in charge.
 

JohnnyB53

One of the Regulars
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289
Location
Seattle, WA
avedwards said:
So can anybody think of a good comeback to hoody wearing youths when they say Inspector Gadget? I have checked the amazing list but have not found any which quite fit the case. Any help would be greatly appreciated, so that I can battle the poorly dressed morons with words.
Inspector Gadget!

Yes, that's correct. Central casting just called. You must be Thug #2.
 

Goose.

Practically Family
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898
Location
A Town Without Pity
Two in one day. Well, maybe not "dumbest". Actually two I, personally, had not heard before...the pic below was taken right after the visit to my watering hole after I heard these:

1> Hey, it's "Spy Vs. Spy" (stumped me)

2> Which one of the Mitchell Brothers are you? (my reply; "ask your daughter")

All in good fun from beer buds I've known. But I've worn this same model hat before.
This was the first day I wore the "new" one...maybe it's just not broke in yet (?)

Click the pic:
 

Jerekson

One Too Many
Messages
1,615
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1935
Goose. said:
1> Hey, it's "Spy Vs. Spy" (stumped me)

Spy vs. Spy is a MAD magazine page that's been around since what, the 60's or something.

Look it up, but I can assure you you look absolutely nothing like those characters.
 

Goose.

Practically Family
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898
Location
A Town Without Pity
Yep. I loved "Mad" and knew what he meant immediately. I used to get every issue. Just stumped me as I had no speedy quip for a reply. Losing my touch.

As for not looking like them...thanks (I think?). Nor do I think I look like a Mitchell ;)
 

Octavius

New in Town
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24
Location
Canada
avedwards said:
So can anybody think of a good comeback to hoody wearing youths when they say Inspector Gadget? I have checked the amazing list but have not found any which quite fit the case. Any help would be greatly appreciated, so that I can battle the poorly dressed morons with words.

How about "go, go, Gadget idiot detector" then point at them
 

Jerekson

One Too Many
Messages
1,615
Location
1935
RobFedoraField said:
Don't know if this one has been posted yet, but I was wearing my Akubra Campdraft and a columbia ski jacket and a guy I walked by said in a thick ghetto accent, "Damn, you look just like Al Capone" I can't even remember my response...

What the heck...
 

funneman

Practically Family
Messages
851
Location
South Florida
The dreaded Inspector Gadget remark

I was walking throught the soccer fields to my son's game last night, in my trenchcoat and a very large brim Penny's Marathon, when this idiot teenager stops in the MIDDLE OF HIS SOCCER GAME to shout, "Hey, it's Inspector Gadget!"

I just kept walking.

Since he didn't get a response from me and since his teammates were too busy with their game to respond, he tried it again. Finally after the third time, he just gave up.

Funny thing is, I decided not to wear a stingy yesterday and instead went for the 2-3/4 brim to avoid just such a remark. [huh]
 

Inusuit

A-List Customer
Messages
356
Location
Wyoming
Wearing my tweed paperboy into a construction office...

"Hey, are you going golfing?" I had no idea what he was talking about and didn't figure it out until later. So I had no snappy comeback.
 
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